KEY POINTS:
I can just imagine the pitch to television executives: "It's the next Sex and the City. But without the sex. And without the shoes and fabulous clothes altogether. And without the cussin'.
"And while we are at it we can dispense with the ribald or witty repartee." So,
what's left? "Three powerful women who are revoltingly successful, skinny and neurotic and who always sleep in satin camisoles. Oh, and some compulsory loser men with salt-and-pepper hair. Also some has-been actors immediately identifiable as Generation X, a background of bloodless pop music, obligatory aerial shots of New York skyscrapers, and a pseudo-sociological subtext which suggests feminism was a mistake and simply makes women unhappy."
"Sounds like a hit. Let's make it." And so Lipstick Jungle was born. And even commissioned for a second season.
Of all the new shows which claim to be the next Sex and the City - Cashmere Mafia, Gossip Girl, and that male equivalent Big Shots - Lipstick Jungle does have the best credentials, given it is based on a novel by Candace Bushnell, the spiky writer of the original SATC. Sneer if you must, but the original SATC book was rather dark and almost literary. The television series was a toned-down version which played up the perky chumminess and played down the pervy grimness. Since then Bushnell seems to have got untwisted because Lipstick Jungle is simply the usual cheesy bollocks.
There are three good friends, all modern New York careerwomen with immaculate lipliner who "support one another through the triumphs and tears that are all part of making it big in The Big Apple." Victory Ford (Lindsay Price) is a fashion designer looking for Mr Right, Nico Reilly (Kim Raver) is a frustrated magazine editor who wants to be chief executive and Wendy Healy (Brooke Shields) is a film producer juggling family and work. The pilot opens with Ford showing her latest fashion range at New York Fashion Week with her friends Nico and Wendy in the front row. From the first glimpse of the clothes you know Patricia Field (the famous stylist from SATC) has gone AWOL. Lipstick Jungle features high fashion implemented by people who think an imitation Prada backpack is the height of chic. It doesn't take long to establish what we are dealing with: Victory is a drip, Nico is a bitch and Wendy is a frump. Got it.
With no wild clothes to desire, it is fortunate Lipstick Jungle has ageing roues Julian Sands (romantic lead in 1985's A Room with a View) and Andrew McCarthy (Brat Pack dreamboat from Pretty in Pink). To sum up the pitch then: Lipstick Jungle is like Sex and the City. But dumber.
* Lipstick Jungle debuts on TV3 Tuesday at 9.30pm.
