Antisocial fliers make for plane hell, says Megan Singleton.
I have sat next to some lovely people in the sky and some not so lovely ones. Here are some of the worst aspects of sharing the sky.
1. The nail clipper
When is it ever okay to take out your nail clippers in the middle of a row of three and start clipping your nails? This happened only last week and the offending passenger was made aware of his grossness when the woman on the aisle started flicking her clothes. I'm not sure if his gathering them up in a little pile to take away made it better or worse.
2. The stink bomb
On the lucky occasions when I get to turn left and sit in a Business Class seat, I expect to feel a little bit special. I don't expect to spend the entire flight gasping for fresh air against the window because of Mr Armpit who has settled in across the aisle. And yes, he removed his shoes, but I was more affected by the strenuous effort to get them off than the blend of fragrances that followed afterward.
3. The armrest hog
I once read that the person in the middle has right of way when it comes to armrests. It makes sense - the passengers on either side can lean outward. However, when the Man In The Middle overextends his arm so that his elbow sits permanently under your rib cage, it is definitely not okay.
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4. The toilet splasher
If you wouldn't leave your own bathroom with splashes on the seat, floor and everywhere else, then don't leave the plane bathroom that way! I always pack slippers for that very reason. Never enter an aeroplane toilet in your socks lest you take home more than you might have hoped.
5. The screaming child
As I write this I am in the air over America. I have my noise-cancelling earphones on but I can still hear the blood-curdling scream of the baby about 10 rows back. I know, it's a terrible thing for the parent, too. But hey, you brought the kid along, so don't sit for hours just holding it. Get up and move around, go for a walk, a jiggle - something so the other 165 of us can get back to our states of boredom.