The Beach

* *

Cast: Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert Carlyle, Tilda Swinton, Virginie Ledoyen, Guillaume Canet

Director: Danny Boyle

Rating: R16

Opens: Now showing, Village and Hoyts theatres

Review: Greg Dixon

Expectations can be a dangerous thing.

Just as this film's young backpacker expects the title's strip of sand to be a paradise on Earth, those who fell for Alex Garland's best-selling book will have expectations about the value and quality of the novel's screen double.

The latter seem destined for disappointment. While those have read the book (I am not one of them) mostly talk about a mesmerising page-turner, this two-hour adaption from director Danny Boyle (Shallow Grave, Trainspotting, the hopeless A Life Less Ordinary) is little more than a picturesque pot-boiler.

If Garland's book is supposed to be "absorbing," this is simply boring.

Essentially The Lord Of The Flies meets Lonely Planet, it finds young backpacker Richard (DiCaprio in an unspectacular but not unappealing performance) searching for adventure rather than a holiday under the Thai sun. From a half-mad fellow traveller called Daffy - Carlyle doing his nutter thing again - he learns of a secret island paradise with a perfect, hidden beach and no "parasites" (that's you and me).

After persuading a young French couple to join him, Richard sets off with a map and discovers ... well, it certainly isn't paradise, more like a bunch of Dionysian hippies jealously guarding their dope stash.

While the Lord of the Flies reflected on civilisation's flimsy veneer and the immutable rules of survival, The Beach is a tawdry tale of selfish pleasure-seeking and its inevitable hangover.

Boyle no doubt wanted this to be Garden of Eden allegory for our hi-tech times, with human nature subbing for the snake.

What he delivers is an uneven, unlikely reminder that you should never wish too hard for something - in Boyle's case, Hollywood. You just might get it.