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Home / Lifestyle

Bride slammed by mother and guests for no food, drink or entertainment at $20,000 wedding

NZ Herald
21 Apr, 2024 11:42 PM5 mins to read

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Former Port of Auckland CEO Tony Gibson goes on trial, recession hits the job market and a candlelit vigil has been held for the Sydney stabbing. Video / NZ Herald / Getty / AP

A woman’s wedding was so much of a disaster that her mum had to admit to her daughter the night had become a “running joke” among guests after the bride and groom failed to accommodate guests with food, drinks and entertainment for the couple’s special day.

The couple spent A$20,000 ($21,794) on their wedding about a year ago. But, despite the sizeable budget, they failed to feed attendees, serve drinks, or organise entertainment for guests, who instead had to push through the night with no food and muted celebrations.

Furthermore, the couple had bought a wedding cake, but it was fake and inedible, serving to decorate the space instead.

Guests left the wedding feeling “mad” by the entire experience.

A year after the wedding, however, the bride approached her mother about the negative chatter she’d heard from her sister and other guests who attended. In response, the mum gave her an honest assessment of how people felt.

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While she acknowledged the bride herself enjoyed her wedding, the mum said the lack of hospitality and care provided by the couple made it a bad experience for guests, and that made her daughter label her a “jerk” and “cruel”.

In the comments of the mum’s Reddit post, thousands of people agreed with her stance. Many people were shocked and could not understand why the now-married couple chose not to look after the people coming to their celebrations.

The wedded couple were happy with the way their celebrations went, but guests were less than impressed by the lack of hospitality and care for attendees. Photo / Getty Images
The wedded couple were happy with the way their celebrations went, but guests were less than impressed by the lack of hospitality and care for attendees. Photo / Getty Images

“Am I the a**hole for being honest and telling my daughter that her wedding is a running joke of what not to do if you marry in our family/friend group?” the mum wrote on Reddit.

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“My daughter got married about a year ago. She spent about $20,000 on her wedding, it was a wonderful experience for her but for all the guests it really sucked. All the money went to things the couple would enjoy.”

Detailing where the A$20,000 mostly went, the mum revealed that the couple used most of it to rent the venue, hire a photographer and buy a A$6000 dress for the bride.

The mum said because she was dealing with medical issues at the time, she did not partake in any of the wedding planning.

“Guests had to buy food, drinks, and no entertainment. So people get to the wedding and the ceremony happens, then they go put into another room after a long day of driving out, don’t get any food/drink,” she continued in the Reddit post.

“Most of them were forced to buy overpriced food since they were starving. They didn’t even get any cake since the cake was a fake. Overall not a good guest experience.”

The bride’s mother said the wedding became “negatively talked about” and guests were complaining to their circles soon after.

“My other daughter is getting married and asked for my help. Her sister offered to help and my other daughter made it clear she doesn’t want her wedding to be anything like hers,” she wrote.

Despite the A$20,000 budget for their wedding, the couple spent most of the money on things for themselves, not the guests. Photo / 123rf
Despite the A$20,000 budget for their wedding, the couple spent most of the money on things for themselves, not the guests. Photo / 123rf

“My daughter asked what she meant by that and I was honest with her. That her wedding wasn’t a good experience for guests and it is a running joke at this point with family/friends. I thought she already knew since a lot of people hated her wedding.

“This caused an argument and she called me a jerk by the end. I pointed out all the issues had with her wedding and she thinks I am being cruel.”

Despite the mother and daughter getting into an argument over the matter, most people on the Reddit post took the mum’s side and said the bride should have prioritised looking after guests during the wedding.

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“Making guests pay for their food? No entertainment? The cake was a lie?” one person wrote.

“Yeah, if I were a guest, I’d be mad too! Actually, it would be a story I’d tell for probably the rest of my life. That’s a Grade-A bad wedding,” a second person said.

“Some people are so self-focused they either can’t or won’t see the situation through other people’s eyes. Your daughter and her husband sound like this because it should have been obvious to them that they were creating a very poor experience for their guests,” a third added.

The bride's mother claimed the wedding was "negatively talked about" and that guests were complaining to their circles soon after. Photo / Unsplash
The bride's mother claimed the wedding was "negatively talked about" and that guests were complaining to their circles soon after. Photo / Unsplash

“You were being honest. It’s been a year, it’s fine. She asked and you answered. Maybe could have left out that it was a running joke. But how in the hell does someone spend $20k but they have no food?” another wrote.

Although most agreed the bride should’ve done more for her guests, some people believed the mum could’ve been kinder in her approach to the conversation with her daughter.

“There’s honest, and then there’s brutally honest. You should have said it gentler, leaving out that ‘everyone thought it was a joke’. That was cruel,” one person said.

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“You didn’t need to tell her that her wedding was a running joke with friends and family. It seems like you wanted to throw it in her face that you didn’t approve of her wedding, there are definitely much nicer ways to tell her,” another person wrote.



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