In my life as a drag queen comedian I am constantly on the road. I love being out and about and meeting new people but being a showgirl in transit has its own special difficulties. Here are my tips for surviving the before-and-during travel moments.
"I have to fit that much in there!" To avoid chaos and medicinal champagne when packing, I write myself a list of what I need for my shows. The amount of wigs, costumes and shoes is enough to make any bag checker warm up the credit card machine for the extra fees.
I have become a bit of a master at downsizing and using the same items multiple times, with just little bits added or taken off. Travelling is all about being inventive because let's face it girls, 23kg is never going to be enough.
If I was ever going to win an award for acting it would be for my role of "Person with Light Carry-on at Airport". I have many years' experience of pretending that my tote bag is filled with light snacks and a cardy. The reality is that the sucker is stuffed with five sequin gowns, two pairs of platforms and enough cheap jewellery to make an Olympic lifter puff.
Just remember to not struggle, have a pleasant smile and be extra nice to the crew.
I promise you that an airport lounge is the best invention since do-it-at-home waxing strips. There is nothing nicer than a buffet before the skies and Koru Club is definitely my favourite - anywhere that serves Bloody Mary's 24/7 is all right by me.
Have a moment to relax before you take to the air because, darling, you deserve it.
Once you've accepted that you are not flying Business or even Premium Economy, try to make the most of your surrounds. With a bit of styling, everything is better. I organise my cushion, my blanket, shove my book into that too small pouch and make my own zone for the flight.
Flying is one of those amazing moments where you can just turn off, watch some movies, read a book . . . or even write an article about travelling for the NZ Herald.
Safe travels my darlings and whatever you do, have fun doing it.
Anita Wigl'it will be in Drag Unplugged and Ending HIV Big Gay Out as part of the annual Auckland Pride Festival, February 1-16, 2020