Five Carona virus gags to get you through…
1. ALERT!!!The corona virus can be spread through money. If you have any money at home, put on some gloves, put all the money in to a plastic bag and put it outside the front door tonight. I'm collecting all the plastic bags tonight for safety. Think of your health.
2. Ever since it was brought to my attention that you can say "Covid-19" to the tune of "Come on, Eileen," I've been unable to read it any other way..
3. Just been sensibly stocking up on 45 packets of pasta and noticed a lot of idiots panic buying.
4. To be honest, staff at my local bottle shop were under the assumption that I've been panic buying alcohol for the last four and a half years.
5. The guy who invented hand sanitiser must be rubbing his hands together right now.
Air guitar world record broken
A festival in Australia broke a Guinness World Record when 3,722 people played air guitar to AC/DC hit Highway to Hell. The Perth Festival began on Sunday with the bid for a record for the largest air guitar ensemble. The organisers successfully beat the previous record of 2,377 people, which was set in September 2011 in California.
While most chefs try their best to make desserts look as yummy as possible, but Ben Churchill does the exact opposite. He goes out of his ways to make his sweet confections look completely inedible; he does this by disguising them as ashtrays full of cigarette butts, dish washing sponges complete with detergent foam, and even rotten fruit with disgusting-looking green mould. The dessert pictures is actually an Olive Oil Sponge Cake With Mint Crumb, Sweet Milk Foam And A Baked Apple Puree.
Jokes I've Told That My Male Colleagues Didn't Like
1. What's completely original but said by two different people? My idea that Greg just repeated louder.
2. Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just actually that incapable of controlling yourself while in the presence of a female colleague?
3. Why couldn't the blonde dial 911? Because her manager said if she ever told anyone what happened, she'd never work in this town again.
Sideswipe: Decapitate your ginger, Westies!
Sideswipe: Creeped out by this sign? #metoo
Sideswipe: It's called fashion, look it up