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Home / Talanoa

How a Samoan boy's fascination with death turned into a life-long career

By Aaron Ryan Te Rito journalism cadet
NZ Herald·
13 Jul, 2022 05:00 PM3 mins to read

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Auckland-based Samoan funeral director Ese Tatupu in his younger years. Photo / Supplied

Auckland-based Samoan funeral director Ese Tatupu in his younger years. Photo / Supplied

South Auckland funeral director Ese Tatupu was just a young boy when his father died - an event that would spark a fascination with death and a life of service for his community.

Tatupu was six years old when his father suddenly died at Ngāti Otara Park, in Otara, during a church kilikiti (Samoan cricket) games day.

His family was shocked and although he did not understand what was happening, he was curious.

"I didn't know what death was."

He remembers his father being brought home in a funeral casket and the moment the lid was lifted. Tatupu described being fascinated at seeing his father lying there looking peaceful.

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"[I thought]: 'Wow, why is my Dad cold? What's that...chemical smell'?"

A fascination with death

Tatupu's curiosity continued throughout his childhood and teenage years and got to the point where he would ask his mother and friends if he could go to funeral services with them.

Those personal experiences have enabled him to use his knowledge to care for the dead now and to make sure families know that they can trust him during times of grief.

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The Samoan funeral director and his business - which carries his name - are well-known within the Samoan and wider Pasifika communities around Auckland.

He holds the highest qualifications in the funeral industry, including some from the US, and is a tutor at the Thirty Six Plus School of Embalming based in Manukau.

Tatupu will be coaching a new generation of young mortuary embalmers, who he believes will take even better care of all communities in Aotearoa.

"Families don't often have someone who works in a funeral home," Tatupu said.

He and his staff have the mindset that they are blood-related with every family and person they care for and it is a mentality that helps them maintain a five-star reputation within the Pacific Island community.

The team at Ese Tatupu Funeral Directors based in South Auckland. Photo / Supplied
The team at Ese Tatupu Funeral Directors based in South Auckland. Photo / Supplied

Victoria Togafau used the funeral home to help plan her mother's funeral during last year's strict lockdown, when they could not attend the service in person. Tatupu organised a live video stream for the family.

"They stayed right through to the end until the diggers had filled mum's grave and laid her leftover flowers out for her.

"It definitely meant a lot to us, especially considering the scorching sun that day."

A family business

Tatupu's three eldest daughters - Vanessa, Serena and Alyssa Tatupu - all work at the funeral home.

Vanessa said their dad was "a bit extra," but in a good way.

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Samoan funeral director Ese Tatupu. Photo / Supplied
Samoan funeral director Ese Tatupu. Photo / Supplied

"I think it's because he loves what he does. It shows by the care and love he has for the families."

Fellow funeral director Liz Vakauta paid tribute to Tatupu and said it was important to have successful Pacific people in the industry in the local community.

"His success in the industry brings hope to the younger ones in the community - especially our kids in South Auckland."

While Tatupu continues to help families plan funerals, he is also looking to the future and passing more control to his daughters to run the business; with the hopes they will eventually run it.

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