Mean Mums' star Aroha Rawson: 'Trust your instincts, not that hard-hitting fear that can thud in the pit of your guts'

The beach and bush are where Aroha Rawson feels happiest. Photo/Supplied

Actor and producer Aroha Rawson is known for starring in comedy series Mean Mums and is currently working with indigenous playwrights to present new works in the Kōanga Festival 2022, presented by Te Pou Theatre at Basement Theatre and Corban Estate, September 23-October 8. Here she talks about self-parenting, living with chronic pain, and naked sea swimming.

To say morning is not my strong suit would be very generous! Maybe because of this, and with early morning starts on set, I do have a bag of tools: Go to bed before 10pm. No phone. Magnesium. I have an alarm with a gentle sound, so I don't wake up grumpy. I set it early…enough time for two or three snoozes, a gentle rise from the depths.

My routine consists of a shower first, it's vital to get my whole system cranked and refreshed for the day. If there is a river or beach outside, a swim first is the best. Rooibos tea and gluten-free toast with marmalade or my homemade cereal with stewed or fresh fruit. Check emails.

I can't start my day without water, coffee and a glimpse of the Waitematā to settle my flow.

Conveying the truth of who I am and my mood through my visual presentation is a large part of how I communicate with the world and simultaneously how I feel most comfortable. That applies to choices for a full-blown film premiere outfit, as much as it does to when I am working at home in the comfiest tracksuit, my favourite ring and my Red Band gumboots for a dash to the mailbox, or naked in the sea.

I feel my best

when I have been in the ngahere (bush), the moana (sea) or just had that special, rare moment when I think I may have just nailed the truth in a scene. Actors are extremely self-aware creatures, despite what others think. We are often questioning, "can I do better?" So, when the moment comes when you feel "yusssss" it's a wonderfully rewarding rush. Almost as good as making my Mum laugh.

Rawson with her mother, Mary Smillie. Photo/Supplied

To keep fit and healthy I stretch and walk. I am lucky to live in Auckland's Herne Bay, right where the walking/biking path to Wynyard Quarter begins, so regular outings along the sea are my go-to. I live with chronic pain so it's a balancing act. Different days mean different things are possible. If I'm feeling good, I love to dance, fish and dive for pāua.

To keep mentally and emotionally healthy I remind myself to breathe deeply. I've recently learnt the terms "self-parenting" and "being your own best friend". My therapist asks me "what would you advise your best friend to do if she had the same question?" I reply, "ahh, yes!"

I definitely feel connected, clearer and more relaxed when I hang out in rock pools, with Te Whānau Marama (the stars) and in the bush. I love a yarn with the birds. Meditate. Swim. Sing.

The best advice

I've ever been given about life is: "Just take the bull by the horns and do it!" Mum, circa 1993. Also, trust your instincts. Not that hard-hitting fear that can thud in the pit of your guts, listen to the equally elevated and grounded sense of simply knowing.

Three mean mums: Rawson, Morgana O'Reilly and Anna Jullienne. Photo/Supplied

The values I live by are

Kia aroha, kia pono, kia maia. Love, truth and bravery.

As I get older, I realise the never-ending realms of mātauranga Māori are glorious and deeply comforting. I love clever communicators. Growth in any area, facilitated through emotionally intelligent and clever communication skills is hot. Also, a bangin' pair of kicks and sweet sounds will take you farther than you ever imagined. Sustainability is sooo 2017. Be regenerative.

I've suffered from imposter syndrome in the past and I learnt that imposter is a darned fool. Laugh in their face and get on with fulfilling your intentions.

When the going gets tough, I tell myself: You've gone through worse. The blood of your tupuna – Māori, Scots and Irish – runs in your veins. Honour them, they've got you.

The things that make me happiest are the moana. Being in it, on it, gathering and feeding whānau from it. And my Mum, she thinks I'm hilarious 24/7, which confuses me, but she's happy, so that makes me happy.

On Sundays, you'll find me snoozing, reading and eating with friends in winter…road-tripping and paddling around the rocks in summer.