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Home / Lifestyle

Kiwi Rosie Dowling’s healing journey: From farm wife to sole owner after tragedy

nz-womans-weekly
By Kasia De Vydt-Jillings
NZ Woman's Weekly·
6 Dec, 2024 04:00 PM4 mins to read

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Rosie decided to stay and run a 440-hectare South Island sheep and beef farm after losing her husband. Photo / Country Calendar

Rosie decided to stay and run a 440-hectare South Island sheep and beef farm after losing her husband. Photo / Country Calendar

After losing her husband in a shock farm accident on the first day of the level four lockdown while she was stuck at Starship Children’s Hospital with their sick baby, Rosie Dowling knows more than most, life really can change in an instant.

Which is why, despite loving concern from family that it was too much to take on, Rosie decided to stay and run their 440-hectare South Island sheep and beef farm.

“It did look near impossible from the outside,” admits Rosie, 39, who’s mum to Harry, nine, Digby, six, and Olive, five.

“But I read primary loss is losing the person and secondary loss is losing the life you shared. I felt that if I put my head down and bum up, I could control the secondary loss for the kids.

“The farm oozes Gav. Everything we do, he’s around us, whether it’s his boots in the shed or the fences he built. His dogs still work for me and I still look back on his diaries.”

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Digby, Gavin, Olive, Rosie and Harry months before Gavin passed away. Photo / Unscripted Love - Photography by Aimee
Digby, Gavin, Olive, Rosie and Harry months before Gavin passed away. Photo / Unscripted Love - Photography by Aimee

In less than five years, she’s gone from farmer’s wife to sole owner and operator of the Ward property, not far from Blenheim – all while raising three children, the youngest of whom has Ebstein’s Anomaly, a rare cardiac condition that required three open-heart surgeries.

“Olive has just started school and still has a very delicate heart,” says Rosie. “But we try to enjoy what we’ve got and not overthink or overanalyse it.

“Gav died at 34 and my motto now is we have to make the most of what he can’t, try to live each day to the fullest and not mull over the negatives.”

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Rosie was 28 when she first met Gavin at the Methven Pub.

“I loved his infectious smile,” she recalls. “He loved to have a good time, but his biggest strength was what a hard worker and provider he was.”

She’ll never forget the moment she learned he was gone on March 26, 2020. Olive was just eight-months-old and they’d been back in Starship for several weeks as she desperately battled what would be a common cold for most children.

Olive desperately battled what would be a common cold for most children at eight months old. Photo / NZ Woman's Weekly
Olive desperately battled what would be a common cold for most children at eight months old. Photo / NZ Woman's Weekly

Gavin had been flat out at home, looking after their sons, with support from family, while running their farm and a separate lease farm down the road.

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“I saw a police officer walking up and down the corridors of the cardiac ward, then a nurse practitioner came in and told me what happened.”

With all commercial flights grounded due to lockdown and their little girl’s health so unstable, Starship’s National Air Ambulance was called in to transfer Olive to Blenheim’s Wairau Hospital and get Rosie home to her young sons.

It’s believed Gavin tripped while running down a grassy hill and died from a bleed to the brain, but Rosie still finds it hard to understand.

“He was fast, fit and healthy, and moved around the farm with such ease.”

Throwing herself into farm work has been therapeutic.

“When I feel frustrated, being on the farm is where I feel closest to Gav.”

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Rosie was 28 when she first met Gavin. Photo / NZ Woman's Weekly
Rosie was 28 when she first met Gavin. Photo / NZ Woman's Weekly

Initially, they bought the property with Rosie’s brother and sister-in-law, and planned to develop it to sell again within five years, but in 2022, Rosie bought them out and has no plans to leave.

She says her brother Simon Todhunter, neighbour Sandy Chafey and farm consultant Peter Bradley have been invaluable as she learned the ropes. She also has the support of farm worker Arthur Harris.

Now, with all the kids at school, Rosie has even found time to launch a second business, Kelvin – ThermoKennels, after developing an insulated kennel and lightweight, flat-pack dog run based on an idea her late-grandfather designed.

Rosie believes she’s right where she needs to be. Photo / NZ Woman's Weekly
Rosie believes she’s right where she needs to be. Photo / NZ Woman's Weekly

“I always had this itch to get it successfully to the market,” says Rosie, who features on an upcoming episode of Hyundai Country Calendar.

“It’s made with 100% New Zealand wool and recycled plastic, and creates an environment similar to the housing building code standard.”

Learning to work with Gavin’s farm dogs and knowing he’d be proud of her inspired Rosie to keep going with the idea.

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“Without his dogs, it would be challenging, but they’re getting older,” says Rosie.

“I just put them in the insulated kennels and believe they’re using less energy overnight to keep warm. Hopefully, that helps with arthritis and their longevity.”

The work is never done, but Rosie believes she’s right where she needs to be.

“Seeing the kids’ personalities and individual strengths start to shine brings me joy, and I look around and see everything Gav’s done to set us up for a settled, positive, future.”

Watch Rosie on Hyundai Country Calendar, Sunday, December 8, 7pm on TVNZ 1 and TVNZ+.

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