As one of many singletons in Sydney, I have found myself living alone in lockdown with plenty of time in my hands. So yes, I succumbed and watched the Netflix series that has got everyone going gaga, Sex/Life.
So before I go off on a foot-stomping rant, let's start by addressing the elephant (trunk) in the room. Yes, the lead character, played by Wollongong stud Adam Demos, has a giant pecker.
And yes, I have heard from a "very" good source that it is indeed real. We're talking, someone who has been up-close-and-personal. Side note: Some bloke also slid into my DMs to tell me that he was a mate of Adam's back in his Wollongong days, and apparently Adam was famous for doing the "windmill" at parties.
OK, now that we've got that ridiculousness out of the way, can I please state one major, glaringly obvious problem I have with Sex/Life.
The storyline is not just badly written, it is also shockingly outdated.
Not since the 0s, when I would fake a sickie off school and enjoy a glorious day on the couch watching tragic midday movies, have we seen the female lead play a character who is just so cliche!
Yep, a bored housewife who has given up her career to rear children and look miserably out of the window while her husband heads off to the city to climb the career ladder.
Question for the room, does that really still go on?!
Why must Billie, the female protagonist, still be portrayed as a lonely horny housewife? There's a heck-load of females with raging sex drives, and you know what? They also have at least a side hustle.
As Tanya Hennessy mentioned in our podcast chat this week, couldn't she at least have an "Etsy business" on the go?
Now listen, I am not having a go at stay-at-home mums. Oh lord no! As someone who needs a nap after just looking after friends' children for an hour, I tip my hat to you.
But the basic premise of this show is saying you have to make a choice: either be a loving stay-at-home mother with a so-so sex life or be footloose and fancy-free with raging hormones that you can act on. But you must choose and if you choose the latter, prepare to be judged. Heavily.
It seems the moral of the story is if she wants to be the character everyone loves and adores, she must choose the first option. Put her family first. No matter how miserable she is. For only the devil himself would choose to uproot their lives in order to make themselves happy.
Now, here's a theory. Why not put yourself first?! No longer attracted to your constantly whining husband who you are not sexually attracted to? Here's an idea, leave.
As a child of divorce, I have seen the pros and cons from both sides. Growing up in a family atmosphere that was horribly unhappy, I was exposed to the constant fighting and deep-seated resentment that came with sacrificing happiness because "keeping the family together" was the right thing to do.
It wasn't until my youngest brother finished high school, that my parents finally said "catch ya later" and parted ways.
What came after that was two people who could finally get on with their lives. The lives they deep down had always wanted to live. My mum hopped on a plane and travelled the world with her true soulmate. My dad moved straight back to the country town he has always wanted to return to, and you know what, they're the happiest they've ever been.
It left me scratching my head, thinking, why the heck didn't you do that years earlier?! And I know why. It's because societal pressure kept them together. They were so worried about separating the family, and the public shame that came with divorce. So instead, they plodded along in a marriage that left them fairly miserable for a good chunk of their lives.
It had a lasting effect on myself as well. I never grew up wanting to race down the aisle because my interpretation of marriage was that it was a miserable situation you could find yourself stuck in. No thank you!
So when you stumble upon a storyline in 2021 that's basically saying – if you stay in a marriage, no matter how miserable it makes you, you're a saint. But leave a marriage and perhaps return to a career you love and a man that makes your knees shake, good lord you are the devil!
Nope, it's 2021! Isn't it time we changed the narrative?!