Mollie Salmon, a contestant on yet another inane Love Island spin-off, made this comment during a recent episode: "I actually dated a boy with loads of allergies. When you go to a restaurant and you can't eat anything on the menu,it's really frustrating." After that aired, a charity called Allergy UK had a whinge on social media: "We're disappointed with statements made by a @LoveIsland contestant ... re food allergies ... We urge speaking up about allergies yet such attitudes make it harder to do so." Really? Yes, really. And then, in fear of their daughter being cancelled, her family released an apology. "We'd like to apologise for any upset caused by the allergy comment made. This was not said with any bad intentions and wasn't said to purposely be offensive or upset anyone. Mollie herself suffers from an allergy to seafood!" (Yes, her name is Mollie Salmon and she has a seafood allergy.)
Secrets shared
1. My wife passively aggressively points out my failings to the dog when I'm in earshot. I tell her this is pathetic but, when she goes out, I sit him down and give him my account of events at length.
2. Meeting my wife's father for the first time: I went in for a handshake, he went in for a hug. The result was his earlobe making its way into my open mouth where I tickled it with my tongue. We've never mentioned it and it's been 15 years. It's buried deep.
3. Met a disgusting racist on a hen party, which happened to be on a cruise around Sydney harbour. She spent half of the cruise looking for her $1000 Prada handbag, which is now laying at the bottom of Sydney harbour. Whoops.
4. I once had a temp job in university admin printing degree certificates. On my last day, I printed myself a certificate with the award of MA in Interpretive Dance.
5. I once got so stoned I watched an entire movie on mute and cried because I thought I'd gone deaf.
6. I always say "thank you" to Alexa so that when AI becomes self-aware and takes over the word I will be spared enslavement.
Mannequin spat
It's the kid I feel for.
Has the world forgotten the Golden Girls?
Quick crossword clue in the Guardian: "Young women". Answer: "Girls". My grandmother regularly got together with "the girls". Not one of them under 80.
