SPOILER ALERT: If you've not seen tonight's episode of The Bachelorette NZ and want to do so without knowing anything of the foibles of the blokes vying for the affections of bachelorettes Lesina Nakhid-Schuster and Lily McManus, do not even think about reading on.
Hey, can we steal you for a second? Because The Bachelorette NZ was back on our screens tonight. SINEAD CORCORAN recaps the action.
Good evening and welcome back to my nightly recap of what you missed on The Bachelorette.
As we're approaching the tail end of this train wreck, the remaining boys have moved into a special new house just for the finalists – but they'd better not go getting their hopes up, remember.
"Everyone thinks I have two options but I actually have three," Lesina reminded everyone.
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"I could decide to choose no one."
At the cocktail party Lily whisked Quinn away for a final one-on-one chat before the rose ceremony, and off camera expressed her concerns that she's worried they might not have enough banter – which, let's be honest, is of the utmost importance in these trying times.
The women also revealed they're both concerned they might not have a strong enough sexual connection with Jesse and Logan respectively. And look, let's be honest about that too – in the midst of a pandemic lockdown, we're all going to need a partner we can stomach Doing Bits with around the clock because there's not much else to do at the moment.
Despite both being acutely aware that Lesina will probably (and very understandably) choose to stay single rather than shack up with either of them in quarantine, Logan and Aaron have opposing views on the decision.
Logan tells her if she ends up picking no one, he'll absolutely respect her even more for making such a tough decision because it'll be the right thing to do.
Aaron, on the other hand, tells her if she picks no one it will be a "harder pill to swallow" than if she chooses Logan. But if she does choose Logan he'll be sad "for at least three weeks". Stunning and brave.
After her one-on-one with Quinn, Lily dragged Richie off for one last pow wow. He idiotically decided to utilise their final time by rehashing that drama from when he got busted bitching about the girls.
Lily was understandably not super jazzed about having to once again go over the issue, and when it came time for the rose ceremony she burst into tears and ran off into the bushes for a (very understandable) cry.
I think we can all relate to this bush tantrum right about now, it's a huge coronavirus mood. Sending thoughts and prayers my gal, we're all in this together.
Tune in to The Bachelorette NZ again on Sunday night at 7.00pm, and in the meantime subscribe to the official Bachelorette podcast, Can I Steal You For A Second – hosted by yours truly and my wing-woman Anna Henvest. Plus, follow along with us on Instagram for all our behind the scenes vids.