Dinner thwarted. A reader writes: "Sick to the back teeth of deciding what to cook night after night and trudging to the supermarket day after day, I decided on a food delivery subscription. But on Sunday I waited for delivery but it was a no-show. A delivery issue I'm told. The next day, waiting again and I get a call from the delivery guy. He hesitates then asks: "Do you have a bear?" he asked. "No mate, it's a joke." Shhhhhh! Much laughter. He took it well.

Pets behaving badly

"Our dearly loved and sadly now departed Aussie terrier, Basil

Female Joker

The first bloke tweets laundry advice