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Home / Business / Companies / Aged care

Tips for teaching your teens not to spend - Diana Clement

Diana Clement
By Diana Clement
Your Money and careers writer for the NZ Herald·NZ Herald·
25 May, 2024 05:00 PM4 mins to read

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Every child and young adult is different with money. Photo / 123rf
Every child and young adult is different with money. Photo / 123rf

Every child and young adult is different with money. Photo / 123rf

Diana Clement
Opinion by Diana Clement
Diana Clement is a freelance journalist who has written a column for the Herald since 2004. Before that, she was personal finance editor for the Sunday Business (now The Business) newspaper in London.
Learn more

Diana Clement is a freelance journalist who has written a column for the Herald since 2004. Prior to that she was personal finance editor for the Sunday Business (now The Business) newspaper in London.

OPINION

Are you feeling exasperated with your offspring and their money? I get questions like this: ‘Diana, can you teach our kids to be better with money?’ The short answer is “not in every case”.

But I feel for exasperated parents like the one who complained to me recently that her son spent $300 on Uber Eats in a fortnight and then asked mum and dad to spot him for his rent. Interestingly, the parents are modest with their money, so it wasn’t a case of monkey see, monkey do.

Every child and young adult is different with money. If you have more than one, you’ll know that. From the start, one of mine was a spender and the other a saver.

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Some offspring get dealt a bad hand in life, growing up in poverty or with other issues which affect their money mentality. Others may be on the autism spectrum, which manifests in a wide range of ways, and can make managing money difficult.

Talking (not preaching) about money unemotionally as a normal part of life is one way to get started. It’s about floating ideas. Broached carefully, that $300 on Uber Eats and its consequences could be a turning point for the young man.

But let’s be honest here: many children don’t listen to their parents. In that case, finding a mentor can be a good idea. That can be someone you know who has learned to manage money. The offspring themselves may have friends who are financially sorted that they could learn from. I meet plenty of young people who have their financial heads firmly screwed on.

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I heard Jordan River of The Morning Shift podcast speaking at a Te Ara Ahunga Ora Retirement Commission conference. River has been working with Sorted.org.nz to impart better financial nous on his listeners. He said that young adults need to hear it from older people, but that they might identify with someone in their 30s or 40s better than their parents’ generation.

Likewise, various speakers noted that Māori and Pasifika were more likely to learn from their own culture than Pākehā services. Many iwi offer financial mentoring, as do Pasifika groups, such as Le Fale in Porirua, which is doing great work.

Anyone still in fulltime education should be able to connect with age and culture-appropriate financial mentoring via their educational institution.

Despite popular opinion, young adults do read books, electronically or in traditional format... I’ve been reading Erin Lowry’s Broke Millennial just lately and it’s a great book for people getting started in financial adulting. It covers all the basic stuff from dealing with the dreaded B-word (budget) to navigating money with friends and partners. The Barefoot Investor by Scott Pape is another great primer on personal finance for newly minted adults and is updated regularly as well.

If books aren’t their thing, then go social. Do some research on their favourite social media platform and find some channels for them to follow. TikTok, Instagram and other platforms have channels with good advice if you search. Podcasts may be better, however, because they are more in depth. The Happy Saver podcast is a great New Zealand option, because it tells real life stories rather than preaching. My colleague Frances Cook has a very informative podcast called Cooking the Books.

In the case of teens and children, there are steps that can help prevent them flying the nest with no financial nous. Christians Against Poverty NZ, which provides free money courses and mentoring for people of all ages, has some great tips.

  • Explain the “why” before the “how”. This is a great one for the dining table. Once they understand the benefits of managing their money, they will care more about the how.
  • Use a motivational, goal-based approach. Tamariki don’t often get to make a wide variety of choices, so encourage them to choose a goal to save for. Then you won’t have to push them to put their money aside. They’ll already be motivated.
  • Make it visual. Athletes keep the finish line in sight, and children are motivated when they can visualise something. That may be colouring in a big thermometer.
  • Pay pocket money so they can save for goals.

Finally, use cash. It may be on its way out, but spending cash is good exercise for teens and young adults. It makes money more real.

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