"What’s considered attractive is shifting – perhaps for the better." Photo / 123rf
Ten experts share what they think will happen in the world of dating, relationships and romance in the new year.
While dating and relationships look different for everyone, there’s one thing that is almost universally true: when it’s good, it’s great. I mean, why else are so many people looking for “the one”?
A new year is an opportunity for a fresh start, with dating trends that will be sure to emerge as the months progress. Questions about the role that artificial intelligence will play in our relationships or what will be the new “running club” (aka, place to meet singles) have been swirling. But we wanted to hear from experts in the world of romance about what they think singles and couples might expect in 2025. Here’s what they said.
What’s considered attractive is shifting – perhaps for the better. There’s an interesting, subtle, yet unsurprising shift in what people find attractive during initial “get-to-know-you” conversations.
The markers of attraction used to be: “successful”, “funny”, “ambitious” and “confident”. This language dominated dating profiles and conversations about what people wanted (and should look for) in a romantic partner. Now I am hearing a rise in qualities like “grounded”, “steady”, “balanced” and “down-to-earth” that are the new inexplicable romantic draws.
Suggest that you haven’t checked Instagram in months? You had me at “logged off”. Demonstrate that you are informed but not drowning in a torrent of anxiety-inducing headlines? Watch for the glint in their eye. Say that you know nothing of the latest trend? Swoon. – Lakshmi Rengarajan, host of the podcast The Later Dater Today
I think we’ll continue to see more exploration around non-monogamy in married couples and definitely with singles. Even if more “traditional” married people won’t actually open things up, they’ll start talking about the possibilities around and interest in sleeping with other people, or dating outside the marriage, with less tension and angst. I also think some women, specifically mums, in perimenopause will start to vocalise their profound disinterest in sex and the disappearance of their libido without shame or apologies, but with frankness. Maybe even with humour and, ideally, self-acceptance. – Alyssa Shelasky, editor of ‘Sex Diaries’ at The Cut
When President-elect Donald Trump comes into office, I think that dating is going to take a hit. Because the economy is going to change, inflation is going to continue, things are going to become more expensive. It’s going to take time, but it means that people are going to tighten up their wallets. Men are not going to be taking women out as they used to. This is a bit more of a heteronormative prediction, but you can relate it to all kinds of pairings. There’s going to be less discretionary income, which means that there’s going to be less of a dating culture and more of a hookup culture. – Anwar White, dating and relationship coach
Our expectations for a life partner are at an all-time high: best friend, co-parent, gym buddy, personal chef, life coach, passionate lover. Now we expect the impossible to be delivered by an algorithm, a digital matchmaker. I predict that in the year ahead, people will expect apps to deliver greater connections in real life. Dating bears a disturbing resemblance to the hiring process. To remain useful, the best apps will elicit playfulness, spontaneity and curiosity. Dating has become too isolated from the rest of our lives, and I predict that daters will seek ways to integrate dating into existing circles instead. – Esther Perel, psychotherapist and host of the podcast Where Should We Begin?
As a new [US] presidential administration takes power in 2025, political views will be make-or-break for many singles, especially among straight people: in the 2024 presidential election, women ages 18 to 29 favoured Vice President Kamala Harris by 38 points, while men in the same age group preferred Trump by 13 points – a 51-point difference. From reproductive rights to men feeling disillusioned about their prospects for success, so much of this election revolved around gender. There’s no way that won’t impact dating. Already, some conservative men are hiding or downplaying their views to appeal to women. – Hannah Orenstein, editor at Bustle and the author of Meant to be Mine
I predict parents paying for their child’s dating services. We’ve had mums DM us or fill out profiles for their children. Because of that, we’re actually allowing parents (or grandparents) to purchase setups as gifts. We think this comes out of the exhausted landscape of dating and parents recognising how different it was when they were partnering. And with the average age of marriage creeping higher, families are ready to get in the ring and help their families expand. – Nandini Mullaji, matchmaker and co-founder of Sitch, a dating concierge app
My prediction for 2025 is platonic romance! Women have shifted beyond self-care and operate in a mode of self-preservation. For some, dating is exhausting, perplexing and unfulfilling. Instead of navigating the hellscape of red-pill podcasts and “your body, my choice” bros, women are “dating” their friends. For some women, depending on their geographic locations, dating and sex can become a life sentence because of varying abortion laws. When we include racial outcomes, pregnancy can become a death sentence. Women are choosing what is safe; statistically, that doesn’t always include men. Whether it’s hot yoga or group Pilates, a pasta-making or floral arrangement class, girls’ trips, movie dates or potluck parties, women are opting out of dating boys and going out with the girls. – Lauren Napier, beauty and lifestyle expert and founder of The Sp1nster, a lifestyle brand
Many men will continue to struggle to find their feet in dating as they come across a lot of women who are financially better off – higher earners with bigger job titles. Women will increasingly find themselves “intimidating” men who are disconnected from their value in the marketplace. And AI will become your ultimate wingman – more people will be using AI to write their profiles, edit photos and write entire dialogues for them on dating apps. Some will even use AI clones to do the whole thing for them. Others will use AI dating coaches to practice chats before a date, help them come up with conversation topics and suggest preplanned date ideas in their cities. – Matthew Hussey, dating and relationship coach
I think long-distance relationships are becoming more common because of the internet. People in coastal cities kind of like having the freedom of their own lives and the sexiness of a Parisian crush whom they can text all day (my only will to live). Phone calls will have a massive resurgence because everyone is getting hand cramps from textingitis and phone sex is actually better than sex in the physical realm. – Stef Dag, stand-up comedian and host of digital dating show Hot & Single
I think 2025 will be a big year for leaning more into community, mutual friends and social networks for dating. With a new president and societal changes ahead, I predict that stability and deeper connections will become central in romantic relationships. I see lots of potential for bringing back blind dates, and people relying more on real-life vetting before going on dates. – Maxine Williams, founder of We Met IRL, a speed-dating event in New York City
This article originally appeared in The New York Times.
Written by: Gina Cherelus
©2024 THE NEW YORK TIMES
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