A bad day has become a whole lot worse for one Western Australian truckie, after he had a run in with the law Monday morning.
The unnamed driver was slapped with an enormous A$1200 (NZ$1314) fine and 12 demerit points on Monday for driving 37km/h above the speed limit.
According to the speeding ticket, he was caught driving his semi-trailer 97km/h in a 60km/h zone through the regional town of Pithara, 260km north of Perth.
His explanation is a cracker, but you can't help feeling sorry for the poor bloke.
He told the officer: "I needed to sh*t, kids have given me gastro".
To make an unfortunate situation even worse, double demerits were in place while the state celebrated their Queen's Birthday long weekend.
It seems Western Australians have a bit of a reputation for using creative excuses to try and wheedle their way out of tickets from the boys in blue.
Last week, a driver was busted driving 132km/h in a 110km/h zone, and pleaded their case by whining: "I'm on cruise control!".
It's not quite clear why they thought that would work.
In April, a Wanneroo man made headlines when he was fined $300 and six demerit points after his family dinner took an unexpected turn.
He was caught running a red light, and when quizzed why he didn't stop, he told police: "I'm in a rush to get the kids Nando's".
Undoubtedly, it was the most expensive fast-food they've ever had.
The same month, an unaccompanied learner driver was caught driving 41km/h over the limit with a blood alcohol reading of 0.05 at Bertram, in Perth's southern suburbs.
Police were told: "I'm doing it for my mum, it's a long story".
As you can imagine, the officers weren't exactly sympathetic, publishing a copy of the ticket with the hashtag "date with the magistrate".
In January, officers from Three Springs, a tiny town about 320km north of Perth, fined a driver A$200 (NZ$219) and two points for allegedly driving 127km/h in a 110km/h zone.
When given an opportunity to explain their behaviour, the driver simply told the officer: "The wind was pushing me".