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Home / Travel

New Zealand's most ridiculous travel complaints

By Thomas Bywater
NZ Herald·
24 Sep, 2018 03:30 AM6 mins to read

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Missing the point: Not all of New Zealand's 3.5m visitors find what they are after in Aotearoa. Photo / Getty Images

Missing the point: Not all of New Zealand's 3.5m visitors find what they are after in Aotearoa. Photo / Getty Images

From "smelly mud pools" to a national bird that's a "bit boring", brutally honest online reviews have uncovered many truths about our tourist attractions - as well as a lot of confusion.

Lusty Glaze Beach in Newquay is a small, ruggedly charming beach, the kind of which you only find on Britain's bracing south west coast. In 2017, it was named 'beach of the year' by the local tourism board, but now it has a new accolade to boast: "most ridiculous visitor complaint", as awarded by The Guardian.

A scathing review was posted to the beach's Facebook page complaining of "a big rock in the middle part of the beach." The visitor had cut herself while swimming and thought the
dangerous" features should be removed.

Lusty Glaze replied, saying they were sadly not sure about what could be done about their "little natural feature" but they "hope this lady gets well soon."

Management of privately owned Cornish beach said it had received a number of memorable questions and complaints from visitors over the years, including "what time do the waves start?" and "when will the dolphins appear?" but they could not remember anyone complaining about the rocks.

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New Zealand's attractions also have their own fair share of unusual complaints.

The country's abundance of visitors has led to a more than a few confused and equally bewildering reviews.

As a country of four million catering to an impressive 3.5 million annual international visitors, tourist contentment is the lifeblood of New Zealand'seconomy.

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The increasing importance of online reviews mean that most attractions will bend over backwards to appease a sightseer who feels slighted. However, some things are just beyond their control.

Here are some of the most unusual and entertaining TripAdvisor complaints from tourists visiting NZ.

No lava here: Auckland's Mount Eden crater has left volcano enthusiasts cold. Photo / Getty Images
No lava here: Auckland's Mount Eden crater has left volcano enthusiasts cold. Photo / Getty Images

Dormant volcanoes leave visitors fuming

The volcanic landscape and distinct lava formations surrounding Auckland gives it one of the most attractive and distinctive skylines in the world - but not everyone is impressed.

One tourist's magma filled dreams were extinguished on a day trip to Rangitoto Island. After returning on the Fullers Ferry trip they took to TripAdvisor to complain the "Extinct volcano crater [was] disappointing.....just a hole with a few trees."

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Likewise, Mount Eden's green crater has left some tourists cold.

"No[t] a lot to see of what was once a Volcano (unless you have a vivid imagination)" wrote one reviewer - although he found it good value.

"It's free so put it on your to do list whilst you are in Auckland"

Another disgruntled Airbnb user staying near the volcano was not convinced, reasoning "there was no lava. I'm pretty sure it was just a mountain."

Dim view: One visitor to the Waitomo glowworm caves found the experience less than enlightening. Photo / Getty Images
Dim view: One visitor to the Waitomo glowworm caves found the experience less than enlightening. Photo / Getty Images

In the dark about Waitomo Caves' appeal

The otherworldly lights of the Waitomo glow worms have featured on BBC documentaries and have been seen by millions. However, one tourist had a rather dim view of the hype.

After a trip to the caves to look for glow worms he took to TripAdvisor to complain the cave was "too dark". Visiting such a dark place was a "safety hazard", he insisted.

Until the tour operators decide to switch the light on, he recommends visitors either buy good insurance or "avoid it for your own safety."

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Raising a stink: The Pool of Wai-o-tapu Roturua. Photo / Getty Images
Raising a stink: The Pool of Wai-o-tapu Roturua. Photo / Getty Images

Rotorua: the big stink

The primordial landscape of Wai-o-tapu's thermal pools in Rotorua are a draw for thousands.

The unique volcanic landscape is part of what influenced the New York Times and Trip Advisor to name Rotorua as a must-see for 2018. However, the area's sulphurous smell is inescapable. Over 1000 TripAdvisor reviews - good, bad and indifferent – can't help but mention "the smell".

However, one reviewer's critique of the attraction was of a more elemental level.

"Absolutely hated this place" she wrote, saying "it was just pools of bubbling stinking muddy water."

She's got them there.

The call of nature: Milford Sound is famed for its scenery and the vast ammount of rainfall. Photo / Getty Images
The call of nature: Milford Sound is famed for its scenery and the vast ammount of rainfall. Photo / Getty Images

The call of nature in Milford Sound

Every year, over half a million tourists flow into the majestic basin of the Milford Sound fiord. What also flows into the basin is 250 inches of rainfall a year, as the wettest place in New Zealand.

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For one visitor this put a dampener the experience:

"You are told the more rain there is then the better the visit. What a load of cr*p. When it is raining it is true you see a few more waterfalls, but in reality the place is wet and miserable."

The increasing number of visitors has been a great concern for both visitors and environmentalists. Some feel the increasing creep of tourism is detracting from the area's wild charm. Yet for some visitors, Fiordland is still a little too wild.

Writing of their stay in the DoC National Park one visitor found it was extremely inconvenient when answering the call of nature:

"The toilets were OUTSIDE and it was cold at night - any thought of a visit to the loo had to be carefully weighed."

Good time not a long time: Not many daredevils complain their bungy is too short. Photo / Getty Images
Good time not a long time: Not many daredevils complain their bungy is too short. Photo / Getty Images

There's always a longer bungy

The original Kiwi extreme sport is something visitors travel from all over the world to try.

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However for some daredevils ,New Zealand's tallest bungy – the Nevis Bungy - has set itself up for a fall.

"Great fun but was over way too quickly," wrote one user of the 134m fall "Needs to be at least three times as long. It's quite expensive for such a short ride."

While the search is on for a ledge that can accommodate such a jump, at least it can be said that Hackett has found something more extraordinary: someone who actually enjoys the thrill of the bungy and not just the bragging rights.

A bit boring... A rare white kiwi chick in Mount Bruce Wildlife Centre. Photo / Mike Heydon, Getty Images
A bit boring... A rare white kiwi chick in Mount Bruce Wildlife Centre. Photo / Mike Heydon, Getty Images

Kiwi bird… a bit boring

It's New Zealand's national bird - one of the rarest and most unique animals in the world. Many New Zealanders go their whole life without seeing a kiwi, but not everyone is impressed.

A visitor to Wellington's Mount Bruce Wildlife Centre thought the flightless nocturnal bird was barely worth writing home about.

They did, however, find time to complain about the resident albino kiwi.

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They found the bird sanctuary "extremely boring. Not much to see. Only saw the white kiwi bird which was not very impressive. Thought that there'll be more kiwi birds for viewing".

The harsh appreciation of New Zealand's unshowy national bird is sure to ruffle a few feathers.

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