Act Party leader David Seymour says he was all good with the insignificant increase in our refugee quota - up 250 to 1000 - but said new arrivals should sign a "statement of commitment to New Zealand values". Political commentator Morgan Godfrey (@MorganGodfrey) wondered what those values could encompass, so asked Twitter ...

1. Legally you are free to punch someone while standing on this (see above picture, credit

2. If you disagree with someone, throw a dildo at them.

3. Loving cars ... hating public transport ... still complaining about traffic.


4. Parking on the footpath to leave the road clear.

5. Posting online tributes when Shortland St characters die.

6. You've got a pair of summer jandals and a pair of winter ones.

7. Houses earning more than you do.

8. Houses that are colder inside than out.

9. Being real proud of the 81 tour protests, but mocking anyone who tries to protest in 2016.

10. Having no interest in te reo Maori but making damn sure you have greenstone or bone carving for you OE.

11. Pre-loading before the school ball.


12. Winter: feijoa cake, juice and face mask.

13. Pronouncing Whangarei as Wonga-ray.

14. Inter-generational, inter-island disdain for Aucklanders.

15. Voting for the PM since he seems like someone you'd like to have a beer with.

16. Coming over here ... taking Maori land ... then complaining about Chinese coming over here ... taking our land.

17. Wanting to exhume, and retrieve the DNA of, and then clone, David Lange. The only realistic way to save the Labour party.


Read more New Zealand Values here...

Photo / Supplied
Photo / Supplied

"I am Open2view Area Franchisee for Auckland Central/West," writes Mike Taylor. "That is my photo featured in Sideswipe yesterday and I'd like to clarify. The 'tower' in the image is actually not a photoshopped Sky Tower at all. It's actually a crystal hanging in the window!"

Donald Trump Cat Scratching Post.
Donald Trump Cat Scratching Post.