Russell was happy to comply with the compulsory drinking at Kingsland's Canton Cafe.

My cunning secret plan

Up to mischief: "When my friend and I were at high school, we decided that the best way to get out of school would be to have the place shut down," writes a Wellington reader. "So we went to the local council and got the water mains plans and turned the main off (and yes, we did get the school closed down and the principal never found out how)." Have you got a secret? Has enough time passed for you to share? Email Sideswipe - anonymity guaranteed.

Happiness in Wi-Fi heaven


Doug recently downloaded a Wi-Fi analyser application on a phone to help set up broadband at home. It shows the frequency of all the local Wi-Fi routers nearby so you can set it to a band that is free so you get good reception. It was left turned on and showed something funny on the bus on the way into the city from Auckland's North Shore. Someone in Northcote has named their Wi-Fi router "Lovenest". What other weird Wi-Fi routers are out there?

Ex-boyfriend's toothache fixed

Revenge is a dish best served with a sedative. A dentist in Poland, who was dumped by her boyfriend, got revenge. He asked her to help his toothache just days after he broke up with her. "I tried to be professional and detach myself from my emotions, but when I saw him lying there I just thought, 'What a bastard'." She then gave him a massive dose of anaesthetic and coldly plucked out his teeth one by one.

Educational shock treatment

John McCallum had a physics professor at university who was known for simple, practical demonstrations. "One memorable day he walked into the lecture theatre with a small battery and a large coil of wire and asked the 300 students present, 'Does anyone here think they cannot get an electric shock from a 6 volt battery?' One chap (not me) put up his hand and was invited to the front, asked to hold both ends of the coil of wire on the battery terminals and then remove one end while retaining the bare wire in his hand. The poor chap convulses with the shock, 299 students roar with laughter and 300 students (one in particular) will never forget the principle of electromagnetic self-induction!"

One way to remember

Paula writes: "In my 4th Form year our science teacher, Mr Roddy from Macleans College, was explaining all the science equipment. He placed a test tube up each nostril and stated, 'A test tube will always fit up your nose ... but a boiler tube never will'."