This week's Beehive Diaries on the dance to distance the PM and the media, and the Speaker becomes the Diaries' hero by righting a wrong.
Monday: Of all the hotels in all the towns in all the world
News emerges that an Australian visitor with Covid-19 was staying at the QT Hotel in Wellington.
That was the very same hotel at which Finance Minister Grant Robertson had spoken about the economic impact of coronavirus to the Wellington Chamber of Commerce.
The patient arrived the very next day.
Meanwhile, back at Parliament the Prime Minister was asked to demonstrate the "East Coast Wave" she had advocated as a way of greeting to avoid hand contact.
The PM did one, but so subtly many missed it.
Her sign-language interpreter, Alan Wendt, on the other hand smashed out a more impressive effort – a quick double wave of the sharp nod with raised eyebrows.
Turns out it works just as well in sign language.
Wednesday: Trevor Mallard, the new champion of pedants
Heather du Plessis-Allan: Ardern's risky moves, Bridges' tone-deaf response
Claire Trevett: Is Simon Bridges right to criticise Covid-19 response?
Watch: How do I do the 'East Coast Wave'? The PM shows how
Beehive Diaries has long had a gripe about the increasing and invidious practice of MPs and staff using the title "Minister" as an honorific.
This foul deed has resulted in ministers of the Crown being called Minister Jones, Minister Genter, and the like.
It began under National, which peppered press releases with references to "Minister Brownlee" and the likes.
But it has now become prolific in spoken conversation as well, even at the highest levels of government – Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern frequently refers to her underlings as "Minister Robertson" etc.
Finally, the Speaker has acted on this. In Question Time, Transport Minister Phil Twyford referred to Shane Jones as "Minister Jones".
Mallard pulled him up for it, saying, "'Minister' is not an honorific and should not be used as such".
When David Clark subsequently slipped in a "Minister Genter", Mallard enforced his ruling, ordering Clark to sit down. "Maybe I didn't make myself clear enough earlier on. 'Minister' is not an honorific; you can refer to the Hon Julie Anne Genter or the Associate Minister of Health. Start again."
Speaker, we salute you.
Thursday: Is the PM keeping away from the media, or vice versa?
Recent changes have brought an end to the days of the "media scrum" in which media cluster in a horseshoe around the Prime Minister, holding their microphones up.
In the Covid-19 days, her daily "stand-up" is now done in the Beehive Theatrette, where she holds her more formal post-Cabinet press conference every Monday.
There, the PM is more than 3m away from the nearest journalist, up on a podium, while the media are also spread out around the seats.
Most saw this move as a way to protect the PM – but it may be more a case of the media trying to protect themselves from the PM.
Given the amount of travelling, and mixing and mingling politicians do, they are seen by some as the most likely to carry Covid-19 into Parliament's corridors. Hence, wise inhabitants are keeping a wide berth.
There was one old-fashioned media scrum this week when the PM visited Rotorua, where the PM raised that same point, saying the distance was as much to protect the media as herself.
Grant Robertson was in wing-man position at the time, and promptly took a couple of small steps away from her.
Meanwhile, political parties are weighing up the impact the election might have on the campaign – a contact-fest in which the 2m rule is difficult to maintain.
In a show of prescience, back in November 2019 Labour's junior whip Kieran McAnulty had tweeted a sneak preview of what Campaign 2020 might look like:
Friday: Making the most of isolation
New Zealanders remain relatively free, but in other parts of the world the lock-downs have resulted in some unusual ways of filling in time being shared on social media.
There are also some DIY hacks for replacing services that are no longer available.
Many are also hilarious.
Below are the Beehive Diaries' current favourite four:
1. The Coronavirus Rhapsody:
I've lost my mind.— Dana Jay Bein (#DJB) (@danajaybein) March 18, 2020
I wrote Coronavirus Rhapsody:
Is this a sore throat?
Is this just allergies?
Caught in a lockdown
No escape from reality.
2. The treadmill:
3. Stove jam
4. The Rebel Yeller: