One of the most successful examples I saw was someone tasked with explaining Australia's live export trade to animal activists. She got past emotion and rhetoric to concentrate on what mattered to both parties -- animal welfare. The following is her recipe for building productive relationships with your critics.
Be principle-driven; know what is important to you and why.
Listen, don't judge.
Ask questions and invite dialogue to identify what they are worried about.
Identify common values to build trust.
Control your emotions, they cannot fight someone who is not retaliating.
Define conversation outcomes. Either progress the discussion or walk away.
This is familiar territory to our policy team. Most of what we do is behind the scenes, providing feedback to regulators and building relationships with stakeholders. It is more effective and less expensive to have a yarn with someone and come to an agreement than it is to end up in court, where the decision is ultimately out of both parties' hands. If people refuse to engage or insist on playing dirty, you just move on.
Having seen how badly regulators can get it wrong overseas, I am grateful for the common sense of most New Zealanders. And I have a new appreciation for the importance of organisations like Federated Farmers in managing one of the biggest risks to farming -- misguided and excessive red tape.