If smacking children is outlawed and yelling at them is just as harmful, what are the options left to parents trying to deal with disobedient children?
Mary Grant, presenter of Parenting with Confidence seminars, encourages parents to think of themselves as firm, fair and friendly.
If children are misbehaving, she suggests parents
take a step back and ask themselves whether the atmosphere at home is fun, if children understand the family rules and know what the penalties are for not co-operating.
It may be a case of using what she calls "grandma's rule", or "doing what you want to do after doing what you need to do". For example, a child might get to go and play after he or she has fed the dog.
Mrs Grant says it's also important to insist that children comply with the "little things" such as saying thank-you. Enforcing the little things early on helps prevent worse behaviour.
If children choose to ignore family rules then two minutes of "thinking time" may help them calm down.
Sue Fitzmaurice, chief executive of Parents Centre New Zealand, says parents can find it hard not to resort to shouting, particularly if they are under stress or don't know any alternatives.
The organisation is lobbying the Government for more parenting education to provide the skills to deal with everyday pressures.
She suggests parents focus on the good things their children do. Encouraging and rewarding good behaviour may help eliminate the less desirable.
If the problem is an argument between siblings, parents could ask them to think of something kind they could do for each other rather than apportioning blame.
If it's a situation where punishment is required, try to do it in a calm and quiet voice.
Both women say it is important for parents to take time out for themselves. Build support networks of friends and family and talk to other parents who may be grappling with similar experiences.
