The first driving dog, Porter. Photo / Jason Dorday
The first driving dog, Porter. Photo / Jason Dorday
Sure, it was the decade of Trump and social media and the gig economy. But that wasn't all there was to the 2010s.
Paul Little looks at 30 shemozzles, sensations and acts of weirdness you may have forgotten.
John Key
He Could Have Eaten His Words
The former Prime Ministerdid his singlehanded best to keep alive the ancient tradition of gags about Maori eating people when he remarked in an address that if he had been at dinner with Tuhoe, he might have been dinner.
Get it – he was saying that the tribe with which the government was in dispute might eat him. Jokes, of course. (2010)
Hair We Go Again … and Again
A Parnell waitress had a lot of trouble getting the Prime Minister to stop playing with her ponytail which he tugged "playfully" when visiting her at work. Just jokes.
Eventually he did and apologised. Strangely, over the months the drama played out, no one thought to just buy him his own pony. (2015)
Key was unable to name the – now deceased – Islamic State leader Abu Bakr al Baghdadi, against whom New Zealand was sending troops to fight. The best he could do was "it's al Jabiri something". Jokes. (2015)
Democracy at work
Don't stop me if you've heard this one before
Jonathan Coleman. Photo / Mark Mitchell
Duty Minister Jonathan Coleman delivered a speech in the House given to him by Revenue Minister Peter Dunne, on behalf of Mr Dunne who was unavoidably detained elsewhere.
The speech introduced the Taxation (International Investment and Remedial Matters) Bill.
He was well into it before anyone noticed it was a speech Dunne had given some years previously about another bill altogether. (2010)
Craig against the machine
Did the moon landing really happen? Ask Colin Craig.
Not one to blindly buy into the latest trendy views and theories, Conservative Party leader Colin Craig told broadcaster Marcus Lush he was keeping an open mind on whether or not the moon landing took place, saying: "I have no idea, mate. That's what we're told." (2013).
Our animal friends
Cow of a day
Friday nights in Kaponga are seldom as lively as this one. A car hit a cow a country road, killing the beast and causing the vehicle to crash into a power pole, which sent a surge to the farmer's house.
This set the cowshed meter board on fire, causing the water line above to melt, putting out the fire. (2011)
Must have left the dog in my other bag
This cat in a backpack was taken for a walk up Mount Maunganui.
A kitty cat in a backpack caused an internet sensation when photos of it being carried up Mt Maunganui were posted online. Animal activists were appalled but there were no reports of copycat incidents. (2019)
Penguins moved into a Wellington sushi store. Photo / File
Flock around the cop
Vigilante sheep brought a police pursuit to an end and led to the arrest of four people when they blocked a road near Queenstown, stopping the fleeing vehicle. The community minded sheep belonged to a local police officer. (2016)
Marine life
Then he rang Chuck Norris and just laughed down the phone at him
Junior doctor James Grant used his diving knife to fend off a shark that attacked him at Garden Bay in Southland.
He stitched up his own wound using a kit he kept in his car for pig-hunting expeditions before heading to a nearby pub for a beer and a bandage. (2014)
Our beloved flounder
Russell Hogg, enjoying a spa at Parnell Baths, was hit on the head by a falling flounder.
A man turned himself into A&E at Auckland Hospital with an eel up his bum. He was treated successfully amid speculation that while he was in the hospital his family were sitting down to a meal of smoked vibrator. (2012)
Three Waitara men were left empty-stomached after kidnapping a security guard and forcing him to drive them to McDonald's in New Plymouth for a feed.
On arrival, they discovered they had no money so got him to turn around and take them home. (2014)
We Keep a Nickelback CD on hand for just such occasions
A Whangarei couple caught two men they accused of tagging their fence and held them captive until police arrived, forcing them to dance to Nickelback, filming the event and posting it – briefly – on YouTube. (2010)
Members only
Who knew they let teenage boys fly planes?
Plane spotters noticed two aircraft tracing out a flight path in the shape of male genitalia over Lake Ellesmere. A Canterbury Aero Club spokesperson said it was a regular flying pattern. (2018)
Normal production was resumed after nearly a year. Rumours that people had tried engine oil and shoe nugget as substitutes in the meantime and found them an improvement remain unconfirmed. (2012)
As fowl a fragrance as ever was scent our way assailed nostrils when the KFC scented candle was launched. Just to repeat: a candle that smells like KFC.
KFC launched a candle.
The short-lived marketing stunt had an overwhelming response although only three candles were given away via a social media draw.
Mussel Woman
Angela Fredericks set a new world record for mussel opening when she prised 100 of them apart at the Havelock Mussel and Seafood Festival in one minute, 55. 28 seconds. (2016)
Fry me a river
As if its natural coat wasn't fatty enough, the humble pie received extra cholesterolic attention when Millers Flat bar owner Jim Russell hit upon the idea of deep-frying the culinary classic. Apparently, he got the idea while making donuts, not while trying to set a new personal best for sit-ups. (2013)
Even more impressively, he was also eating a deep-fried pie at the time
Smashing Rubik's Cube records isn't as common a goal as it used to be, but personal trainer Blair Williamson was ahead of the field when he solved the pesky puzzle 254 times while running the Christchurch International Marathon. (2017).
How you say … WTF?
French hitchhiker Cedric Claude Rene Rault-Verpre. Photo / Westport News
No exponent of sang froid, savoir faire or even cherchez la femme, the young traveller went all Rainbow Warrior on us and ended up being charged with wilful damage after he became frustrated waiting four days for a ride out of town and attacked a road sign. (2016).
Nigel Richards won the French-speaking Scrabble championships. Photo / Getty Images
Although he can't speak French, Nigel was able to memorise every word in the official French Scrabble dictionary to secure victory. A translator was on hand to convey his thanks for the win. (2015)
He's going to buy himself a really nice present with his Airpoints
German Sven Hagemeier has the record for the world's longest birthday, in large part thanks to New Zealand. Hagemeier fiddled with flight times and itineraries to stretch August 4 over 46 hours.
He flew across time zones from Auckland to Brisbane to Honolulu, turning 26 for nearly two days as he went. (2015)
Humans one, robot overlords nil. A Rosmini College footballer avoided a penalty when he took a kick from the school playing field and brought down a drone that was flying overhead while making a promotional video.
The schools' principal said kicking expensive pieces of technology out of the sky was "not behaviour that the school wishes to promote". (2015)
And now, a word from our elf correspondent
To confirm once and for all out utter shamelessness when it comes to exploiting all things LOTR and Tolkien, to mark the premiere of The Hobbit movie, TVNZ's Breakfast broadcast a weather report presented by Tamati Coffey in Elvish. (2012)
Yes, but can you print enough gas to run It?
While many of us are still getting our heads around the idea of 3D printing of any kind, Auckland programmer Ivan Sentch just went ahead and spent much of the decade off and on printing a 1961 Aston Martin. (2013-15)
The first driving dog, Porter. Photo / Jason Dorday
Animal specialist Mark Vette taught a dog a new trick. Or as Wikipedia put it with a remarkable lack of emotion: "Porter, a ten-month-old beardie cross, became the first dog in the world to drive a car." (2013)