Hospital food was dissected and debated in the wake of an article that revealed cutbacks were proposed for this institutional nourishment. It said: "nutrition experts had warned a government cost-cutting team that patients could suffer malnutrition under plans for cheaper hospital food." Such plans "would reduce the amount
Shelley Bridgeman: Why do hospitals serve free food?

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Why do hospitals serve free meals to their patients? Photo / Thinkstock

But closer inspection and a little more imagination reveal the pitfalls inherent in such a scheme. Logistically the two groups of people would need to be separated for ease of distribution of the government-provided food. This ostensibly sensible segregation would lead to cries of inequality. One group of people would be eating mashed spud and runny jelly in one section of the ward. The others would be feasting on whatever takes their fancy in another section.
Media reports would focus on favouritism and elitism - and those receiving meals courtesy of that nice Mr Key would be critical of the two-tiered system. Similar divisions might be accepted on international flights on our national airline but they would be unpalatable in state-funded hospitals on New Zealand soil. It's simply not the Kiwi way.

Photo / Thinkstock
Oh well. That was a promising idea, Caller, but it won't fly.
Still, when it comes to hospital food everyone has an opinion. My three experiences of food in hospitals date back to 2003 when I discovered that if you take a tour of National Women's hospital at 6pm while eight-months pregnant, several other people on the tour will be munching KFC as they walk. However, the tea and toast I was served the next month at the same hospital following a C-section (and about 40 consecutive hours of not eating) still rates in my top ten most memorable meals of all time.
I subsequently transferred to Birthcare maternity hospital in Parnell where my abiding memory is that the women who delivered the meals were exceptionally noisy. We called them "commando raiders" but, upon reflection, that was a misnomer, implying as it does that a degree of stealth was associated with their manoeuvrings. They would barge into the room with all the finesse of stampeding elephants playing the cymbals. They were guaranteed to wake up any slumbering mother or newborn in the vicinity. The food was pretty good though.
What's your opinion of hospital food?