NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Lifestyle

'Phantom Menace' - the pros and cons

30 Jun, 2000 03:24 AM4 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

By Russell Baillie

STAR WARS EPISODE 1: THE PHANTOM MENACE

***

Cast: Liam Neeson, Ewan, McGregor, Nathalie Portman

Director: George Lucas

Rating: PG

It's a very much a movie of bits so let's treat it that way. After all the stuff about it being "episode 1" it's really Star Wars: The First Bit, Twenty Two Years
Late.

Likewise, the high-on-the-hype types who queued up to watch the movie first in the middle of the night will love it to bits.

But here's some news for those who'll parrot "it's not a critic's movie" - when it comes to Star Wars and all it means, you can be a fan and a critic too.

My inner-12-year-old (who saw the first movie in 1977 and has since seen it and its sequels a couple of times since and played the video games) was well primed for a new one.

So much that my outer critic was quite prepared to have the night off.

But sitting a couple of rows from the front in a packed cinema the other night, both got bored together in the film's lengthy flat patches.

Yes, the special effects are spectacular, occasionally. But that's more to do with what's happening in the background. Out front in the story department, it's clumsily plotted and edited. Effectively, it's a two-hour prologue for the further prequels of Ep's II and III.

George Lucas sure hasn't improved much as a director of actors or creator of dialogue. And now he seems he's treating those inner-12-year-olds who fell in love with the original trilogy like they're not-too-bright 8-year-olds. Which, of course, may be the point.

Yes, there are plenty of those aforementioned bits to like, but also ones that even the most Jediophile would find mildly irritating.

So rather than recapping the plot yet again, let's compare a selection of its bits.

Sort of Ten Things I Hate - Or Like - About You, Phantom Menace. Remember, as Lucas himself says, "it's only a movie."

LIKES

1. The film's central idea of showing us Darth Vader as a boy - shades of a sci-fi Godfather Part II. Okay, bit of a stretch, but remember Lucas and Francis Ford Coppola were once partners.

2. The light sabres. Still a cool noise and look, and some good swordfights. And when desiccated by one there's no blood. It's the ultimate PG-rated weapon. Also handy for absorbing laser fire and those troublesome little welding jobs around the home.

3. The pod race, a jet-powered Ben Hur blast across the craggy surface of the planet Tatooine. Adds nothing to the story but it's the main adrenalin fix on offer with its thrilling hurtling down canyons and dodging of rocky outcrops which updates the wild rides of the previous films.

4. Queen Amidala's hairstyle, which is one up on Princess Leia's ear bagels. But the face of the film is Darth Maul's scary visage. He looks like that because he's a Sith (bless you).

5. Yoda, back is he, yes. Younger too, looks he. So too are the tin Laurel and Hardy, C3PO and R2D2. Aww.


DISLIKES

1. Little Anakin Skywalker (Jake Lloyd) is a cute little moppet with a knack for technology and flying fast who gives no hint of his destiny as the helmeted, asthmatic evil-doer. Sort of Dennis the Phantom Menace.

2. Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor as the Jedi Knights who discover wee "Annie." Despite their acting pedigrees they're strangely lifeless. Then again, it must be hard to be animated when everyone else actually is ...

3. That cinema seats aren't fitted with joysticks. Oh, and the reason that prize money race exists is because Neeson's Jedi Knight can't afford to pay for a replacement spaceship engine part, stranding him and his cohorts on Tatooine. You're a light sabre-wielding sheriff of the universe, man. Just take the damn thing and let's be on our way ....

4. Queen Amidala's curiously QEII accent and Darth Maul's lack of anything interesting to say despite being one bad double light sabre-swinging dude who will be a hit at Star Wars theme parties for years to come.

5. Jar Jar Binks, that pidgin Rastaman accent, that Platypus face. Is this Lucas' revenge on us for hating his 80s mega-turkey Howard the Duck which he curiously resembles? He's supposedly there for laughs but he's no wisecracking Han Solo. Come to think of it, even Chewbacca made better sense.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Save

    Share this article

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
Lifestyle

I gave up pasta for a month – this is what it does for your health

Lifestyle

NZ bodycare founder Tanné Snowden: 'Living with endometriosis doesn't mean you're broken'

Royals

'Life is precious': Prince Harry open to reconciliation with royal family


Sponsored

Sponsored: Why heat pumps make winter cheaper

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
Premium
I gave up pasta for a month – this is what it does for your health
Lifestyle

I gave up pasta for a month – this is what it does for your health

Telegraph: It’s cheap and easy, but if you’re in midlife, it might be time for a rethink.

15 Jul 06:00 AM
NZ bodycare founder Tanné Snowden: 'Living with endometriosis doesn't mean you're broken'
Lifestyle

NZ bodycare founder Tanné Snowden: 'Living with endometriosis doesn't mean you're broken'

15 Jul 02:00 AM
'Life is precious': Prince Harry open to reconciliation with royal family
Royals

'Life is precious': Prince Harry open to reconciliation with royal family

15 Jul 01:53 AM


Sponsored: Why heat pumps make winter cheaper
Sponsored

Sponsored: Why heat pumps make winter cheaper

01 Jul 04:58 PM
NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP