Early in her school years, she needed to be excused for a couple of days while we all attended her grandfather's surprise seventieth birthday party in Fiji. We considered it important to attend this family occasion, and to decline simply because we needed to stay in Auckland to babysit our daughter while she went to school made no sense. The school was gracious when it granted us permission for this absence. I was grateful that I wasn't made to feel my request was unreasonable.
Then, when she was eight-years-old I'd planned to leave her home while I accompanied my husband to a conference in London. But our nanny sustained an injury just before we left and was unable to take care of our daughter. With only two days to make alternative arrangements, we decided to take our daughter away with us. (Yes, I could have stayed home but I kind of figured that mothers are people, too, and should be allowed to go away occasionally.)
Again, I was most apologetic when I explained the situation to the school and pleaded for their understanding. The three of us had a fabulous week away in London and Barcelona. Perhaps it would have taken off some of the gloss if we'd realised we were all technically participating in parent-condoned truancy.
The other time we requested leave from school was to enable our daughter to attend the national championships for her equestrian pursuits. When she's been training and competing all year in this sport, we consider it fitting that she be allowed out of school to travel to this out-of-town event.
I'm grateful that the school accommodated this request but I noted this year that the school described this absence as "self-interest leave". That's a harsh term. I would prefer to classify my three examples of taking my child out of school as family leave, business leave and sporting leave respectively. Surely self-interest leave is when parents take children on holidays during term-time because the airfares and accommodation are cheaper. Or they go skiing during the term because the ski slopes aren't so crowded.
Of course, giving permission for children to be taken out of school is a two-way street. Trips away for service, cultural and sporting events are a regular fixture on most school calendars. As a parent, I willingly give permission for my daughter to skip class for a week of school camp which is also known as Education Outside the Classroom (EOTC).
And, last year, at the school's behest, my daughter had a week off school so she could play hockey in Tauranga. Perhaps that was classified as "school-interest leave" since she and her teammates were there to represent their school. So in light of the emergence of the term "parent-condoned truancy", it raises the question of how best to describe school-led trips away.
Maybe EOTC weeks and days away at interschool sports tournaments could be classified as "school-condoned truancy" to reflect the fact that parents aren't the only stakeholders taking students out of the classroom.