Kath Wharton packed a lifetime of love into her 41 years. Photo / Getty Images
It’s been just over a year since the sudden loss of Kiwi Ferns league star Kathleen Wharton, yet her husband, Andrew, is still learning just how deeply she touched other people’s lives.
Kath, née Keremete, was 41 when she died unexpectedly from a heart attack, shortly after flying home from Japan. She and Andrew had been travelling in Asia with their four children, guiding a team of young female league players – a trip that captured who she was.
An adventurous spirit and brilliant organiser, Kath loved seeing the world and bringing others along with her. Whether through sport – representing New Zealand in both league and kabaddi – or whisking her whānau away on busy holidays to Cuba, Egypt and China, she lived life to the fullest.
“I’ve always been a real homebody – the stay-at-home parent so Kath could lead her best life,” says her teenage sweetheart, Andrew. “But she always pushed me out of my comfort zone, saying, ‘Okay, if you’re not coming, you’re going to miss out!’ We ended up seeing so much of the world together. I’ll still take our babies on holidays because that’s what she’d have wanted.”
Their sons, Brooklyn, 20, and Quintin, 14, along with daughters, Manea-Jade, 7, and Niwa, 4, all live with their dad in Kerikeri, close to Kath’s wider whānau.
Kath’s generosity and her boundless energy weren’t limited to those closest to her. Whether on the field or in everyday life, she had a way of inspiring those around her to push themselves, try new things and embrace life with the same gusto.
Pulling on the Kiwi Ferns jersey 14 times, she played at two World Cups and returned to the field at the age of 35 to play for the Warriors Women.
Beyond her career, she was a tireless advocate for developing young people – especially girls – on and off the field.
When her playing career ended, the family left Auckland for the Far North, where Kath, who was proudly of Ngāpuhi and Ngāti Tūwharetoa descent, helped establish and coach the Hokianga Storm women’s league team.
Andrew, 43, tells, “She was always encouraging the girls to go for it, to travel or study like she had. If anyone asked her for support, she’d always help.”
When “a few thousand people” attended his wife’s tangihanga at her Tuhirangi Marae, he was stunned.
“I hadn’t fully realised the effect she had on people,” he explains. “She was a great connector through her sport and through her mahi.”
Kath’s Kiwi Ferns teammate, Honey Hireme-Smiler, tells Woman’s Day how much she misses her old friend.
“We all loved how Kath was so welcoming,” she shares. “We were drawn to her caring heart, infectious laugh and cheeky mocking. She was the glue that held us together.”
Other tributes continue to flow for Kath, who made a difference through her role as Far North manager for Healthy Families NZ. Some of the projects she had been working on have now come to fruition, including the māra hūpara, a traditional Māori playground, in Kerikeri.
The Kathleen Wharton Cup was established in her honour – a new under-19 women’s league competition between Auckland and Northland, the two regions where the star player blazed a trail.
In February, the Aotearoa Māori All Stars Wāhine performed an emotional haka for their former teammate before their clash with an indigenous Australian side in Sydney. Harata Butler, one of Kath’s proteges, placed a photo of her on the halfway line, watched on by Andrew in the stands.
Returning to the places where Kath left her mark hasn’t been easy for her husband.
“It’s been really hard at times, overwhelming, to stand in those spaces we used to be in together,” he admits. “I did a lot of the heavy lifting and she did the organising – we were a pretty good team.”
Andrew and Kath first met playing league and touch in Māngere in South Auckland. She was 19 and he was 22.
“We both loved sport and that’s how we got together,” he recalls. “Māngere was our tūrangawaewae. She was quite cheeky and good at mocking.”
Although they were together for more than two decades, the couple didn’t marry until 2017, eloping to the Cook Islands with their two sons in tow. Kath became pregnant with Manea-Jade soon after.
“She was about eight months hapū on our honeymoon,” Andrew confesses. “Everything was booked, so we were going, no matter what. We went to Egypt, Venice, Athens and London. She even made us cycle through France. Even when our bank account said no, she’d always find a way.”
Now Andrew realises how important it was for their kids to have made those special memories with their mum.
Always “brainstorming”, he recalls how good she was at dreaming up unexpected ideas and making them happen.
It was no surprise that, as a mum of three who was deeply involved in her work supporting young offenders and their victims in South Auckland, Kath came out of a six-year retirement to play for the Warriors Women in the 2019 NRL Women’s Premiership.
Few people know she also represented New Zealand in the traditional Indian sport of kabaddi, a cross between bullrush and rugby. She took a team of former Kiwi Ferns and Black Ferns to the 2013 World Cup in India, where they finished second.
Last year, Kath convinced Andrew to go with her to the CrossFit Games in Texas.
“She was always taking other people on those journeys, opening their minds to seeing the rest of the world,” he says. “I always had her back, no matter how crazy her ideas were. If your partner wants to dream, you support her 100%.”
One idea that she sadly didn’t quite achieve was becoming an Air Force pilot.
“She contacted the first Māori wahine to become a pilot, then did all the testing,” Andrew tells. “Physically, she was always really fit and she got a tutor to help her with maths. She smashed the tests.”
But when it came to the interview stage, the Whartons decided to move north for a quieter life. Yet it ended up busier, laughs Andrew.
Kath became co-chairwoman of Sport Northland, a member of the Rugby League Northland board, and coach of the Māori All Stars and the Hokianga Storm. She was also passionate about her work with Healthy Families NZ, determined to give young adults and children opportunities to thrive.
Now Andrew wants to continue giving their own tamariki a rich life in the north.
“It’s so good for my babies to be connected to who they are and where they’re from,” he enthuses. “They can climb their maunga and swim in their awa. They’re kura kaupapa kids – te reo is their first language. That’s something we both wanted, so I’ll carry that on for Kath.”
Looking at his children, he sees many of his wife’s traits – both girls are witty, smart, and athletic. Manea-Jade is a cross-country champion like her mum.
“Quintin has the best of both of us,” shares Andrew. “He’s quite determined and, like his mum, he’s a really good leader. He sits on the taumata kōrero [speakers’ bench] for us on the marae and he loves his footy. He aspires to be like his mum.”
Brooklyn, who plays league alongside his dad, has moved home to help with his siblings.
“We’ve had a massive village supporting us too,” reveals Andrew. “I guess when you give, people give back.”