Chivalry is not dead. Just ask Twilight poster boy Robert Pattinson who has leapt to defend his leading lady (and rumoured lover) Kristen Stewart over her recent brain fart, aka that now infamous "rape" comment.
Stewart, who has developed a particular penchant for opening her mouth before engaging her brain of late, made a slight boo-boo during a recent interview: she compared paparazzi intrusion in her life to "being raped".
The Twilight star told Britain's Elle magazine: "Your little persona is made up of all the places that people have seen you and what has been said about you, and usually the places that I am are so overwhelming in the moment and fleeting for me - like one second where I've said something stupid, that's me, forever," she said.
"What you don't see are the cameras shoved in my face and the bizarre intrusive questions being asked, or the people falling over themselves, screaming and taunting to get a reaction.
"All you see is an actor or a celebrity lit up by a flash.
"It's so... The photos are so... I feel like I'm looking at someone being raped. A lot of the time I can't handle it.
"It's f****d. I never expected that this would be my life."
Needless to say her unfortunate choice of words didn't fall on deaf ears. The likes of RAINN - Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network - spat the dummy and wagged a judgmental finger in the starlet's direction.
Stewart later issued a mea culpa, chastising herself for the poor analogy.
"I really made an enormous mistake (using the word 'raped'), clearly and obviously. And I'm really sorry about my choice of words. 'Violated' definitely would have been a better way of expressing the thought," she told People.com.
'Little nerds behind their computers...'
In a new interview with Entertainment Weekly, Stewart talks about the gaffe, and reiterates that she "used the wrong word".
"I'm so sensitive about stuff like that," she says.
"That is the one subject that means a lot to me. I made one movie directly concerning [rape] [2004's Speak], and I made another one where my character has a horrible history of rape [2010's Welcome to the Rileys]. I talked to a lot of people about it. I used the wrong word."
And up pops a snippy Pattinson, who offers a plate of hate for those who dare protest against his lady and her foot-in-mouth syndrome - particularly gossip bloggers.
"None of those associations came out and gave a statement [criticising Kristen] without being called upon by the media first - who were doing it specifically to get hits on their websites," he snipes.
"That whole system of internet journalists, where no one is called to account, is almost entirely about hate. All these people get away with doing it because they have no responsibility to anyone.
"All they need is to get a salacious headline and people click on it, because it's easy," he continued.
Damn, I've been rumbled. Hate it when that happens. I thought my covert gossip operation was that clandestine and foolproof that nary a soul would ever cotton on to the ugly truth. Cheers Rob.
"And it's quite good being part of these Twilight films because you have to give so many interviews all the time, you can defend yourself. That's the only way. All of us stick together, as well. There are so many little nerds behind their computers, on their little blogs."
How rude! Little blogs? Them's fighting words, mister. Actually no, I'll be the first to admit that I am indeed a nerd behind a computer, punching out whimsical words of wisdom and the occasional woe. What can I say, it's a filthy job, but somebody's got to do it. And after all, someone's got to keep you celebs in line. Simple really.
Onwards and upwards...
Poor Tori Spelling. Sad sack, Martha no mates, party of one. The Beverly Hills 90210 alum says she is not feeling the love from her former co-stars.
"All my cast members hate me," she told Ryan Seacrest during a radio interview this week.
"People say, 'Do you mean during 90210?' I say, 'No, we were great friends during 90210. We were friends after 90210. They all came to my first wedding. All of a sudden I marry Dean [McDermott], and I don't know what happened. I lost all my cast members'."
So, Welsh rugby hunk Gavin Henson, how are you feeling post-Charlotte Church break-up?
"That's just the way it goes," he tells Britain's Closer magazine when probed about his recent split from the lady warbler.
"That's just the way it goes, isn't it? But I'd rather not speak about my personal life at the moment."
And in the same breath he says: "I like going out to parties and enjoying myself - I'm only young."
Now we're getting somewhere. It's been widely rumoured that Henson's 'single guy' mentality and penchant for partying was the final straw that broke his relationship's back. Just sayin'.
Asked whether his blossoming friendship with actress Susie Amy while filming reality show 71 Degrees North had also triggered the break-up, he said: "It was such a long time that I was away - probably too long."
We'll take that as a maybe then.
Flame-haired diva Susan Sarandon has gone under the knife and had her dodgy hoof seen to.
Sarandon injured her foot during a fall while visiting Haiti on a mercy mission in January. She's been on crutches since.
Snapped at the New York premiere of Great Directors at The Museum Of Modern Art this week, she said: "I recently had foot surgery to fix a problem that was aggravated during the trip to Haiti."
She also said she hopes to be back in action soon.
"I hope to resume serious ping pong training in a few weeks."
We bet she does. Especially if those ping pong boy toy rumours are true...
It was only a matter of time, and I'm surprised it took this long to be honest. Lady Gaga has finally eaten pavement while wearing those ridiculous mile-high platform boots.
Clad in leather chaps, platforms and cape, Gaga ate it while making a grand exit from London's Heathrow Airport yesterday.
See the snaps of shame here.
Sorry, but that's bloody hilarious! Those boots were not made for walking, sister.
Is all of Lindsay Lohan's dirty laundry about to be aired in public? Yes, I know, like we haven't seen the entire contents of her wardrobe already.
Suspend your disbelief for a mo and indulge me.
Word at the water cooler says LiLo's former assistant - the one who quit earlier this month because of the perpetual party girl's incessant demands and nutty lifestyle - has reportedly been offered five-figure deals to dish the dirt on her ex-boss.
The NY Post reports that the LiLo's former biatch, known only as Eleanore, has been offered cash deals of around US$50,000 by a series of weeklies.
"She has so far refused the offers, saying she doesn't want to tell on Lindsay as she's afraid she'll never work again," a source tells the Post.
Hmmm, wonder how long it'll be before the proverbial can of worms is spilled. Mind you, we're all pretty used to LiLo's soap opera shenanigans by now. We're practically immune.
This lot just in...
* The dog box. Mariah Carey being hounded by a New York vet who claims she has amassed a whopping US$30,000 in unpaid bills. Dr Cindy Bressle says she provided Mimi's three pooches with "extraordinary services". Whatever that means. Things are not so glitter, kittens and unicorns for Mimi here.
* Michael Jackson's gumshoe sister La Toya says the late singer was murdered for his back catalogue.
* Britney Spears back in contact with former boyfriend and lens lizard Adnan Ghalib?
* Clive Owen smoulders as the new Bulgari Man.
* Top ten Tom Cruise moments. They lost me at the 'most talented and well-versed actor' part.
It's been a while, but it's back by popular demand. A little somethin' somethin' to warm the cockles and whisk you away on diamond-encrusted lily pad to that special place called nostalgia...
And here's to wishing you a perfect (pun very much intended) weekend, my good folk. Catch you all next week for seconds.
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