We're FIVE weeks into the first season of The Bachelorette NZ, and what a ride.
Between all the dates, group challenges, rose ceremonies, eliminations and a SECOND BLOODY BACHELORETTE we'll forgive you if you've lost track on who's leading the race/races for Lesina and Lily's heart/hearts.
To help you out, here's The Hot List - a weekly top 10 of who we're tipping to get that final rose. It's based on what we like and what we think Lesina and Lily like and there's absolutely no rhyme, reason or science to it beyond that.
In previous weeks there have been more than 10 lads left, meaning not everyone made our "coveted" list. Now you can count the blokes on two hands, there's nowhere to hide.
• The Bachelorette intruders: Five new bachelors jump in the mix
• The Bachelorette NZ episode 14: Pashes, ultimatums and revenge of the hernia
• The Bachelorette NZ episode 13: Marc goes home, Aaron's out of control and Steve's raging
• The Bachelorette NZ: The Hot List week 3 - the eligible bachelors, rated
Don't forget we'll be running a list until the lucky bloke(s) get(s) their gal(s) - and that might well mean there's at least one fewer name every week. Exciting! So, without further explanation:
Our adorable baby Honeybadger has swoopylala'd his way into first place for bravely opening up about his depression on national television, discussing toxic masculinity and for doing a nudie run. 10s across the board.
Ever-Quinnsistent is still in well-deserved second for continuing to stay cool, calm and collected even as all the other boys are losing their heads like that one coveted chicken in the barbecue challenge. He also gets bonus points for gifting Lily a very thoughtful pressie – a tiny toy dirtbike as a romantic nod to their first date. Quinn, we adore you.
Hot and crazy Mike remains in the top three for another week, for his desperate attempts during the barbecue challenge to cook Lesina a special weird capsicum egg thing because all the chicken was gone and she doesn't eat red meat. He also gets bonus points for seemingly not really being into her much, and you know there's nothing hotter than a man who is ambivalent about you.
He may have slipped out of the top three (for all that carry-on about not being able to choose which gal he was keen on) but now that he's set his sights firmly on Lily I'm sure it won't be long until Richie dropcrotch pantses his way back into top spot.
Despite still being a bit of a stirrer, Jesse's incredible stand-out slam poetry performance this week simply must be recognised. Get your clicking fingers ready, we're doing snaps for Jesse:
"A whirlwing of emotions has hit me tonight,
"Liam and Steve, nowhere to be seen in sight.
"My mind is boggled, confused and dazed,
"wondering when I'll think clear again one of these days.
"As much as I try to think of the end game,
"without my boys this process won't be the same.
"I know it's life and life goes on,
"so this Is a test, I will be strong."
While I still truly cannot recall a single sentence the Kumara farmer has uttered the entire time he's been on the show, he did win the barbecue challenge and his plate of nondescript meat looked the least-bad.
Elliot didn't really do anything noteworthy this week and I think it's abundantly clear he is not on the show to find love but simply for the free holiday with the lads – which I truly have nothing but respect for.
While he didn't do anything insane this week, as a few of the other guys had way more quality time with Lesina, I've got a sneaking suspicion Aaron is on the brink of another nervvy b. Watch this space.
Liam is all over the bloody show ay. One minute he's telling Lily he hates being trapped in this Argentine prison and just wants to cowabunga out of here and go home to Perth, nek minute he's telling her he's Here For The Right Reasons and is All In, Baybay. Another one I've got my eye on for an imminent unravelling.
Logan had a real fall from grace this week when he decided the best way to utilise his one-on-one time with Lesina was to ruthlessly neg her about her lack of basketball coaching skills, never mind the fact she's a qualified doctor.
Tune in to The Bachelorette NZ again on Sunday night at 7pm, and in the meantime subscribe to the official Bachelorette podcast, Can I Steal You For A Second – hosted by yours truly and my wing-woman Anna Henvest. Plus, follow along with us on Instagram for all our behind the scenes vids.