Best Kiwi nicknames
A group at high school were trying to guess each other's middle names. One piped up, saying, "You'll guess mine, it's easy." She became Easy Rogers from that day on.
A dude with the last name Frame gets A-Frame, but prefers Zimmer.
When we had the puberty talk at intermediate, the teacher asked if anyone knew the proper word for testicles. A kid put his hand up and answered "Tentacles". As far as I'm aware that's still his name.
Caitlin gets Caketin and yes she lives in Wellington.
The groom found out at the wedding reception that his new in-laws referred to him as Mark III because he had been proceeded by two other blokes named Mark.
We have a friend called Pillow because every duck hunting season he takes a pink pillow with him. Even his niece and nephew call him "Uncle Pillow"!
I know a tall, skinny bloke nicknamed Hungry.
Mate of mine was Biscuit cause his actual name was Duncan. Another was (and still is) Cookie. His surname is Hudson.
I knew a guy called Darren when I was a chef in a kitchen. He was a kitchen hand at the time and, when he was asked to do some menial task, he shot back, "What am I around here? Dirt?" And from that day on ...
I knew a guy called Dunny Diver who once fell into a septic tank while working for a drainage firm.
I knew a guy nicknamed Hydraulic — because he always reckoned he could jack you up with a female.
I knew a bald headed guy called Fly's Aerodrome.
His beak is worse than his bite
A Thai vet recently tended to an dog that had swallowed 38 rubber ducks, 32 of which had to be surgically removed. A young woman from Pattaya bought a box of 50 yellow rubber duckies as decorations for a swimming pool.
These were ingested by her 2-year-old American bulldog, Davel, while she slept. The woman noticed something was wrong when Davel threw up a chewed up rubber toy in front of her.
When she went to check the box of rubber duckies she noticed there were only 12 of them left and she rushed her pooch to a nearby vet clinic where surgery was successfully performed.