The Diary asks some famous New Zealanders to share their experiences and their thoughts about affairs of the heart.

Paula Bennett, MP

First my disclaimer: I'm happily married to a man I have loved for over 24 years, but only reunited with him about 20 months ago and we are still in our honeymoon phase.

This is quite puke-inducing, really, and does nothing for my tough girl image. It's for the single ladies.

Here's my advice: find the man who is going to adore and love you, bring you coffee in bed, light the fire for you (even though they are not cold but you are), and tell you that you're beautiful even though it's 5am and last night's make-up, which you forgot to remove, is unattractively smeared all over your face and your pillow.


Love him back. Cook for him when you can. Tell him he's strong and handsome. Sit through boring sport occasionally. Don't sweat the small stuff and get on with enjoying life.

Relationships are about working out what's important. As you get older, you want a partner who will treat you right and still be a man.

I warned you it was puke-inducing.

Pua Magasiva, Shortland Street actor

Relationships and love are hard, but the harder you work on them, the better they become. Like anything in life, a relationship is more rewarding if you overcome the obstacles and you never give up on it.

Mikey Havoc, Hauraki host

Love is a whole new thing. A whole heap of fun. A whole heap of trouble. A whole new reason to start the day. Forever. Forgiveness. A reason. Addictive. Amazing. Makes your soul sing. Love is everything. It'll pretty much be the reason for every completely outstanding and every totally stupid thing you ever do .

Sara Wiseman, actor


There should be 50 words for love, like the Eskimos have for snow. I'm no longer interested in the fairytale that the teenager in me was searching for. Now it's about deep vulnerability, courage, forgiveness, authentic connection, inspiration, generosity, trust, laughter and respect.

Sean Plunket, RadioLive broadcaster

Learn to love yourself before you try loving someone else. Parents always love their kids more than their kids love them, but kids love their parents longer. Love is like the wind, it can blow soft and hard, hot and cold, it can lift you up and knock you down, and sometimes it sucks.

Dom Harvey, The Edge host

Love is the reason we are all here. Well, most of us. Some people probably ended up here on the back of drunk encounters with random strangers.

Ben Boyce, Jono and Ben at Ten (TV3)

Working every day together on Jono and Ben at Ten makes for a pretty full-on relationship between me and Jono [Pryor]. But we like to spice things up to keep it interesting.

Some days we'll have a pointless competition to see who can back a trailer while cooking a steak inside the vehicle, and other days I'll surprise Jono at his house by shooting him in the face with a slushie gun. But like any relationship, sometimes we also need time apart. I know when Jono is listening to his Creed CDs. It's a good sign that he doesn't want anyone else around.

Stu Tolan, More FM host

I wasn't 100 per cent sure what true love was for a long time. I knew the love that you get from your parents and family.

I knew the love that you have for your favourite pizza when you're feeling a little off-colour. But it wasn't until I met my partner that I really knew what love was all about. You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. Nothing is more powerful than love.

Matt Heath, Hauraki host

Some say love is like a river that drowns the tender need, while others say it's a razor that leaves the soul to bleed. I love my two little sons a lot. They make me very happy, but it's a double-edged sword because they also make me scared.

Having beings that you love in your life makes you worry about things like nuclear wars and car crashes. Now, when I'm on a plane, I not only worry about my own fiery death, but also what my kids will do without me. What I'm saying is: love is a flower and you're only a seed.

Stacey Morrison, Classic Hits host

Songwriters would be struggling for material if there was no such thing as love. Sometimes all you can do to ease a problematic situation, or person, is send them love. The world needs love generators, and we can all choose to be one.