At this stage, Celebrity Treasure Island is the only thing getting me through lockdown. Without it, I wouldn't know what day it is.
Welcome back to another recap, we have a lot to cover but first things first, Brynley Stent got the note from Angela Bloomfield and thankfully didn't read it in front of the team, but she did decide she didn't want to form the alliance … at least for now.
Last night saw the first pirate market and there were a few clues up for grabs – literally. But like anything in Celebrity Treasure Island, there was a catch. You had no idea what you were buying.
Brynley Stent and Chris Parker teamed up and bought a clue - taking their clue total to two. Edna Swart scored herself one also and after a solid effort from Swart of trying to form an alliance with the two best friends, Parker said "Edna is absolutely taking the piss if she wants two clues for one."
The savvy businesswoman took her clue elsewhere, to the one and only Kimberly Crossman and thus the alliance of the two babes was born.
They are ones to watch, mark my words.
Later at the team face-off, Katipō lost and had to vote for a new captain and I don't think anyone was surprised to see Bloomfield holding the captain stick when they waltzed into the arena for the captain's challenge.
And if all that drama wasn't enough, Bloomfield beat Lance Savali and won her team the ultimate prize, Katipō got to pick someone from Repo to join their team.
"Immediately I know I'm going," Parker told the confession cam and his intuition was right, with a smug grin, Bloomfield called out for Parker.
We kicked off tonight's episode with Parker telling his new teammates all the juicy gossip from Team Repo, well at least parts of it. It is still a game after all and Parker thought he was playing it well, little did he know, Bloomfield was onto him.
"I don't think Chris has spilled all the beans," she told the confession cam, disappointment embedded in her voice.
Over at Repo, Crossman and Stent had a chat on the beach which was more or less Stent telling Crossman their alliance no longer stands and she also said no to Bloomfield's alliance request because she has much cooler (male) alliance buddies.
To which Crossman held in her tears and probably thought speak for yourself queen, I want in on that women supporting women alliance.
Now that I think about it, Crossman is also a thespian (an actress), so why didn't Bloomfield send the note to her?
There was no time for me to ponder as Swart smelt something fishy and confronted Savali. If you think back to the past few episodes, Savali is in an alliance with Joe Daymond, Parker and Stent but if you cast your mind way, way back, he was initially teaming up with Swart.
"I just have to make her feel like I'm on her side." The torn captain told the confession cam, the alliance lie clearly becoming too heavy to carry.
He found the strength last minute though as his newfound ability to lie resulted in Swart offering up her clue. Savali, with a conscience in there somewhere went slightly pale and convinced her to keep it to herself.
Onto the team face-off we went and literally nothing worthy of a recap happened except Richie Barnett hurt himself. Poor lad.
Repo won, yes, again. And it's becoming a narrative that is about as boring and as repetitive as Angela Bloomfield being the villain - which thankfully took a backseat this episode because boy oh boy am I sick of it.
Buck Shelford put his hand up for elimination because he wanted to face off against Barnett, you know, for rugby man reasons, but Swart piped up and decided it was a big hell no from her.
"This is still a game and you've got to play strategy as well." She told the team in a confrontation that gave me a little bit of second-hand embarrassment and a little bit of 'I might go hide in the corner until it's over' energy.
Alas, the elimination round came and eek, hold on to your rugby ball kids, this was an exciting one. Savali decided that ex-captain and All Black legend, Sir Buck Shelford from Repo and ex Kiwis captain and rugby league player, Richie Barnett from Katipō would go head to head.
"The only person I think could beat him is Buck," Daymond told the confession cam.
Rugby lovers all around the country were shaking in their boots, the anticipation was building at a rapid rate and the TAB probably were taking bets.
Unfortunately, host, Matt Chisholm told the two rugby legends they would be building a block tower with massive chopsticks, not playing rugby as I had assumed.
In the most intense elimination round I have ever seen, Shelford was in the lead, then Barnett was catching up, but he knocked over his tower and Shelford was winning once again.
Repo held their breath and each other as they watched with wide eyes while Bloomfield sat in Katipō with a secret smirk. Yes, she thought, either way, it's another male out of the competition.
And just like that, Shelford won. Repo ran over, smothering him in hugs.
"I'd never be able to live it down in the rugby community if I lost to him" Shelford victoriously grinned as he collected his pirate gold.
A sweet hongi between the two rugby players was had and with that, a goodbye to our 9th celebrity, Richie Barnett, but not without one last word from Bloomfield.
"It's karma." She smirked.
"No, this is so bad." Parker looked at the confession cam with fear in his eyes.
Come back tomorrow to see how Katipō copes another player down.
For all the inside gossip and behind the scenes stories, listen to Inside Celebrity Treasure Island hosted by S2 contestant Kim Crossman!