With his backside almost touching the ground, Andrew Louis pretends he's a racing driver.
Rain turns to drizzle as we get the green light to race. Time to get my game face on. My rival, another travel writer, and I are the only ones brave enough to race on a wet day. The track at Eastern Creek International Karting, 45 minutes west of Sydney, is saturated and my first few laps are cautious, but then my inner bogan takes over.
The go-karts are more like drift karts, sliding sideways round each corner and fishtailing when accelerating. With each lap, I push the grip of the slick tyres closer to their wet-weather limits. The steering is stiff and gives my arms a good workout. I manage somehow to hold it on the track unlike my aggressive rival, who pushes too far and has multiple spinouts.
After 15 minutes of solid hooning, we head back to the pits for a much-needed breather and switch cars.
One of the officials advises it is faster to go around the outside of the corners rather than following the wetter race line, but I'm having too much fun sliding these 13hp beasts.
After two rounds of frantic, slippery fun, we compare our lap times on the printout. Looks like my consistent approach provided the fastest lap time and kept me in pole position. I'm claiming the overall win, on account of not spinning out.
Keeping my bogan face on, donning another racing onesie and helmet, my rival and I get a taste of how the professionals race with three laps in Radical racecars at Sydney Motorsport Park. We aren't behind the wheel this time though. That would be insane. These cars reach up to 210kp/h, but being open tops and with us seated low to the ground, it feels like 310kp/h. Apparently, the V8 supercars can get up to 270kp/h. The track is still damp from the morning rain but, surprisingly, the car screams around corners with no loss of grip at all.
If you've got a spare several hundred thousand dollars lying around, you can buy one of these Radical cars but, remember, it costs another $20k a year to maintain. Or you can just get your fix for $159 and get a hot-lap session, going three laps around the circuit.
Slip on that black T-shirt and embrace your inner bogan. It doesn't matter whether you have grip or none at all; behind the wheel or riding shotgun; whether at 13hp or 220bhp. Racing round a track is one of the most heart-pounding activities.
CHECKLIST
Getting there: Air New Zealand flies daily to Sydney.
Details: Eastern Creek Karting is at 50 Peter Brock Dr, Eastern Creek.
Sydney Motorsport Park is at Ferrers Rd, Eastern Creek.
The writer travelled courtesy of Destination New South Wales, Atura Blacktown and Hyundai Genesis.