With the Old Course one side and 300 whiskies on the other, Kevin Pilley is a happy man.
There is nothing quite like having a dram overlooking the headland of swine. And dreaming of walking through the Valley of Sin and raising a claret jug into the air.
It has the best view from any bar in the world. If you are a golfer. Turn around and it has the best view in the world if you are a whisky lover. Golf history is in front of you. And whisky behind. Or vice versa. It is the stuff of dreams.
The fourth-floor Road Hole Bar in the 1968 Old Course Hotel overlooks the North Sea, the West Sands made famous by Chariots of Fire , the New and Jubilee golf courses, the Himalayas Ladies putting green (est. 1867), the Royal and Ancient Clubhouse and, of course, the famous 17th Road Hole of the Old Course, St Andrews, which hosts the 144th British Open championship this week.
I had already had a "Nippy Sweetie" over the fairway in the Links Clubhouse's Swilcan Restaurant - a Tom Morris cocktail. This consists of ginger beer, Caledonian best (any Scottish beer) and Glayva tangerine and almond honey whisky liqueur. The rest was history.
Golf has been played at St Andrews for 600 years. Over 230,000 rounds are played on its seven courses each year, 45,000 on the Old Course alone. The Open Championship has been played on the East Neuk of Fife 28 times. Greenkeeper and oldest Open champion Old Tom Morris laid out the course using a bucket full of sand and some seagulls quills.
The Road Hole has 300 whiskies and offers dramming and golfing workshops. Hospitality on the East Neuk of the kingdom of Fife goes back to when a ginger beer stall was opened by caddie and greenkeeper David (Auld Daw) Anderson. The Jigger Inn connected to the hotel is the old stationmaster's house. The railway opened in 1852 was discontinued in 1969. It has its own Jigger Ale.
As you dram away overlooking the world's most famous golfing landscape, you can taste malts from moth-balled distilleries as well as a tot or two of Tullibardine, the in-house on-trend label. You can learn the old art of half and half with beer with whisky chasers. Dip your hand further into your sporran and you can go on your own bespoke whisky journeys around the Lowlands, Highland and Speyside. Cash in your pension and you can embark on the hotel's Outrageous Whisky Journey and pay about $1220 for three vintage nips.
"Killyloch is an extremely rare malt," my whisky tutor Faye told me. "From the now defunct and much mourned Moffat Distillery. Aromatic on the nose, light and smooth with a touch of sweet vanilla on the palate and spicy dryness to the finish."
We talked base notes and heart notes and extended cask maturation and sherried sultanas and charred oaken embers.
Confront a Scot with a malt and he must commune with it. The world twinkles and hums about him; life becomes miraculous and picturesque.
With a short in his hand, a decanter by his side, a gil in his bloodstream and a couple of miniatures in his pocket, the whisky devotee feels he has life taped; he feels envied and enviable; sane in a mad world.
And a comfortable chair and a great view of a great golf course helps, too.
CHECKLIST
Getting there: Emirates flies from Auckland to Glasgow via its Dubai hub.