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Opinion
Home / Sport / Rugby / All Blacks

<i>48 hours:</i> Dobbing people in becomes national sport

Chris Rattue
Opinion by
Chris Rattue
Sports Writer·
22 Jul, 2007 05:00 PM4 mins to read
Chris Rattue is a Sports Writer for New Zealand's Herald.

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Did the punished All Blacks get a hard deal? Send us your views

KEY POINTS:

It has been the weekend for rugby revelations about dobbing people in. In reverse order, it started with Laurie Mains slipping a note in a newspaper claiming that Anton Oliver's scrum power is a myth.

This is a feud that knows no bounds.

The former All Black coach
started a little tentatively in a column earlier this month, waiting until the middle of his analysis before hitting upon Oliver's lack of tackle-busting input and promoting Keven Mealamu's credentials as the starting test hooker.

Lozza also failed to call for Andrew Hore's promotion to the reserve bench. But Mains put a much firmer foot on the pedal this weekend, going straight past the obvious subject of lineout throwing and hitting Anton where it is aimed to hurt the most - his scrum power. Actually, he did also mention lineout throwing.

That's more like it Lozza.

The problem for Laurie, and it is a serious one, is where does he go from here.

Apart from suggesting that the bohemian Oliver once planted a dirty great carbon footprint on the Otago hinterland, there aren't too many avenues for denigration left after depowering his scrum power.

Andrew Hore would eat Anton Oliver for breakfast is a possible headline next week. Stay tuned anyway. So that's Laurie Mains versus Anton Oliver round 356 out of the way.

Prior to that, we had the extraordinary case of a "Member Of The Public" dobbing in six non-playing All Blacks for breaking curfew by drinking at a club until 4am on Friday morning.

The MOTP informed on them by sliding a note under Graham Henry's hotel room door.

This story had the dramatic effect of reminding everyone that John Schwalger was in the All Black squad.

It also raises endless questions, and here are but a few of them.

* Did the MOTP actually sign the note "From a MOTP" or did he/she sign it "From a Nosy Bastard Who's Got Nothing Better to Do than Dob People In For Stuff-All and Sneak Around Hotel Corridors".

* What was this clearly concerned MOTP concerned about? Was he/she concerned perhaps that John Schwalger might make the World Cup squad?

* How did he/she know which was Graham Henry's room?

* Was the action caught on a CCTV camera?

* Why do the All Blacks have so many rules?

* Why were the Sordid Six at a club at 4am? Is it boring in an All Black camp when you are a fully primed footy player who hardly ever gets to play?

* Is it right and proper that an ordinary member of the public gets that close to the All Black coach. For goodness sake. Where was security? Don't they know who this man is?

* Has this overly concerned MOTP been offered grief counselling?

* When did the Sordid Six make a conscious decision to flout the rules? Did they form a leadership group first?

* Will concerned members of the public now have set times in which they can slide notes under doors and dob players in rather than the remarkably free access that was accorded one of their number on Friday morning?

* What would have happened had the MOTP slid the note under the wrong door? What if he/she had slid it under Richie McCaw's door by mistake? What a position it would have put the captain in. And what if he/she had slid it under Troy Flavell's door in error and Flavell had only just got in. It could have been chaos.

* Was the MOTP identified and given a reward? Maybe he/she could have been made "An All Black for a Day". Then again ... maybe not.

* Has the World Cup squad been fully briefed about the dangers that members of the public present?* What would the note be worth on Trade Me?

* Will it end up in the rugby museum?

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