Crusader's coach Scott "Razor" Robertson, breakdancing at Ellis Park. Photo / AP
Coach Scott "Razor" Robertson's breakdancing on the high veld last week was a life-changer.
He's clearly a top bloke and regular b-boy. But there was something special about that one.
Out there on the international stage after such a fantastic victory for the Crusaders in such an important game. It was beautiful. The up-rocking, the floor rocking, the backspin, the freeze into worm followed by a seamless transition back to the up-rock.
Even the awkward hug of a confused South African cameraman worked. It wasn't just the skill, the rhythm or the entertainment value. The team spirit, the commitment or the fact he pulled it off in a dress shirt, pants and shoes on a grass surface non-conducive to spin.
For me, it was what it means for us as a nation in 2017. Can you imagine Grizz Wyllie b-boying on the field in 1982 after Canterbury took the Ranfurly Shield off Wellington?
I'm not saying he wouldn't have been able to. Like Scott Robertson, Grizz Wyllie was a flanker, the position most suited to breakdancing.
Both disciplines require flexibility, leg and arm strength and the ability to get up and down quickly. I don't have the stats but I imagine loose forwards in general would be more suited than, say, frontrowers.
Locks somewhere in the middle. Interestingly "locking" in the b-boy world refers to movements that freeze from a fast move and then lock in a position for a few beats before continuing at the original speed.
Your life will be a little bit brighter for having this GIF of Scott Robertson break dancing forever in it pic.twitter.com/4xQPzZBDqP
— Three Red Kings (@threeredkings) August 5, 2017
The breaking phenomenon originated in The Bronx in the mid-70s, arriving in Christchurch seven years later. When Grizz took over Canterbury in 82, Cathedral Square was rammed with b-boys and b-girls.
The legendary Smurfazoids Breaking Crew performed to huge crowds in the Garden City in 83. There is no doubt breakdancing would've been on the Grizz radar. So the reason Wyllie never danced on the field in celebration was nothing to do with his knowledge or b-boy skill level.
It was a matter of culture. His hands were tied. Back then if he had grabbed the middle of the circle and started "up-rocking" his sexuality would have been questioned. Possibly on the front page of the Press.
The point is this, Razor Robertson is being celebrated for "breaking" whereas an 80s b-boy Grizz Wyllie would have been vilified. Back in the clubrooms or in the privacy of his bedroom Grizz may have thrown down some basic popping or even the electric boogaloo.
Who knows? But revealing that level of emotion out on the field would not have been tolerated in a 1982-86 Cantab coach. There may have been riots.
Of course Grizz Wyllie moved to Argentina in the mid-90s where that kind of behaviour would've been far more acceptable. South Americans as a rule express themselves with dance more often than South Islanders do.
Having said that, I once saw the Christchurch-born Sir Graham Henry dancing in London. He was speaking at a World Cup event. The great man was in fine form. Cracking some killer jokes.
Later he cut some shapes on the dance floor too. We're not talking b-boy or b-girl here. But he did have rhythm. It was a classic big fish, little fish, cardboard box situation. If we add to that the fact he was wicketkeeper for Canterbury, he starts to look like the All Black coach most likely to b-boy.
From least to most likely to break, I'd go Alex Wyllie, Laurie Mains, Wayne Smith, Steve Hansen, John Hart, John Mitchell, Sir Graham Henry. Which differs from Sky Sports commentator Scotty J Stevenson.
While he agrees Sir Graham is most likely, his list goes Fred "the Needle" Allen, Steve Hansen, Alex Wyllie, Laurie Mains, John Hart, Wayne Smith, John Mitchell, Sir Brian Lochore then Sir Graham.
Interestingly, breakdance isn't a credible term for people in the know. Jo Jo from The Rock Steady Crew put it this way: "The public changed the name to breakdancing, but b-boy was the original name and whoever wants to keep it real should keep calling it b boy."
Isn't it great to live in an age where a Canterbury coach feels free to celebrate on-field b-boy styles? What a truly great New Zealander Razor Robertson is. One of the best. Our world is a better place because of men like him. The pressure is on Hansen to throw down when we win the rugby championship later this year. Even if it's just a quick windmill or body rock.