Close followers of the 2003 Rugby World Cup might recall the witty contributions in the press of a raconteur called Dave Waterston, a stand-up comedian who posed as coach of Namibia.
Waterston had a wonderful start to his coaching career.
In 1995 he was the Springboks' technical adviser during the World Cup and the following year he walked across the floor and assisted John Hart when the All Blacks toured South Africa.
The former Otago centre has remained in South Africa ever since, apart from a short stint in Namibia where he hilariously claimed that his most productive selection meetings were those he held with a bottle of Johnnie Walker Black Label.
I mention Waterston because he has recently been in the news via his forthright views on fellow Kiwi Kevin Putt, the former Waikato man who has been having a tough time of it as coach of the Sharks.
Waterston did not spare his countryman when he told the press that Putt was useless and should be sacked.
"The Sharks have great forwards but their backline is woeful, which shows the difference between forwards coach Balie Swart and backline coach Kevin Putt," said Waterston, who also coached Tonga in the 1999 World Cup.
"If I were the Sharks I would make Swart the head coach and appoint Carel du Plessis [the former Springbok coach who is currently being sidelined at Western Province and the Stormers] as his assistant. Swart worked under Laurie Mains for years [at the Cats and Otago] and is an outstanding coach."
All this is relevant because it might come to pass. The Sword of Damocles is resting heavily on Putt's neck after his three generally unsuccessful years in charge of a team that liked to think it was the Manchester United of South African rugby.
When Putt was the halfback for Natal (as the Sharks were known until they went American in the mid-90s), he was a vital element of a classic team that rivalled the great Auckland team of the same vintage (indeed, these teams contested the very first Super 12 final in 1996).
But since returning to Durban as coach (Putt completed his playing career in Ireland), the Hamilton-born 40-year-old has found that the legends he played with are now TV commentators and that their replacements are cut from somewhat humbler cloth, and it is not so easy to make a silk purse from a pig's ear.
The Sharks lost four consecutive Super 12 home games last year (there was almost a riot at Kings Park) and then the team failed to make the Currie Cup semifinals for the first time since 1991.
Which bring us to 2005. Putt is stockpiling ammunition in the Last Chance Saloon. He has not been offered a contract for the Currie Cup and this will not change unless the Sharks impress in the Super 12. Putt will not go to the gallows without a fight.
His conditioning coach was the first to go and then 14 players were shown the door. He controversially replaced them with a group of up-and-coming youngsters that have derisively been referred to as the "no-name brands" and the "nondescripts".
Putt reckons he will have the last laugh. He was fed up with established stars failing to produce and he replaced them with youngsters who have proved they have the hunger, and above all, the balls, to make it happen for the Sharks.
"Call us what you want," Putt says defiantly, "but when these guys start producing, give them the credit they deserve."
A slim number of 2004 players survived the bloodletting and they fill form a skeleton to which the 13 newcomers will be added. The only veterans of the 2004 Super 12 that remain are: AJ Venter, John Smit, Warren Britz, Eduard Coetzee, Albert van den Berg, Butch James, Craig Davidson, Rudi Keil and Trevor Halstead.
Putt's determination to go to war with only the best-equipped warriors was illustrated when he refused to pick Springbok captain John Smit and veteran Bok AJ Venter for the opening match against the Stormers "because they have not met the necessary fitness requirements".
Putt says that when the pair returned home from Springbok tour duty, they were way behind the rest of the Sharks squad in terms of conditioning.
As Putt prepares for his Last Stand, his policy is clear - there is no place for passengers in his fight to the death.
Their devil-may-care attitude will certainly rattle the fancied sides, and they will win more games than they lose, but how far their bloody-mindedness takes them in the competition is anybody's guess.
VITAL STATS
Titles: 0
Finals: 2
Best finish: 2nd as Natal 1996, 2nd in 2001
Worst finish: 12th in 2000
Biggest win: 74-43 v Highlanders, 1997
Biggest loss: 51-10 v Brumbies, 2000
Backs
Tsepo Kokoali
Brent Russell
Dean Hall
Henno Mentz
Odwa Ndungane
Gcobani Bobo
Trevor Halstead
Adrian Jacobs
Butch James
Craig Davidson
Sandile Nxumalo
Ruan Pienaar
Forwards
Jaco Gouws
Nico Breedt
Braam Immelman
Warren Britz
Solly Tyibilika
AJ Venter
Albert van den Berg
Johann Muller
Brendon Botha
Eduard Coetzee
Wian du Preez
Danie Saayman
Skipper Badenhorst
John Smit
Sharks young and hungry
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