"Oh darling, I'm living in Remmers these days."
There are ways and means of getting your foot in the door of some of Auckland's nicest suburbs or simply a suburb that is one up from what you thought you can afford. It just requires compromises.
One of those compromises could be buying a "sausage block" unit. Also called Franchi & Ion units after the highly successful developers, this style of unit is the long, single-level, brick-and-tile blocks of units that cloned themselves all over New Zealand in the 1960s and 1970s.
They aren't the most beautiful architecture on the market but, as Harcourts agent Don Campbell says, they're rock-solid.
"They are one of the few buildings I would buy without an inspection," says Campbell.
What's more they cost far less than a family home.
Decent family homes in these posh suburbs cost in the millions, sausage-block units in nice areas commonly sell in the late $600,000s to $700,000s. A really special one might sell in the $800,000s. But in comparison to today's low-end apartments,. sausage-block units are positively massive. For example, the unit for sale by Harcourts at 2/84 Ngapuhi Rd, Remuera, is approximately 96m2 including the garage and laundry. With appropriate consents it might be possible to create another bedroom from the garage.
Franchi & Ion units did come in a variety of layouts, even if they look similar from the outside. The unit at 3/41 Nile Rd, Milford, is a Franchi & Ion Mark III, says Premium agent Kathryn Robertson, which means it is around 10sq m larger than earlier designs.
Most have outdoor space, especially those at the far end from the road. Some, such as the Nile Rd unit have an exclusive-use garden.
Sausage blocks have the proverbial "good bones".
More are being modernised, says John Hill of Harcourts, whose grandmother bought one new in Takapuna.
These days the carpets are often removed to expose beautiful floorboards and the kitchens renovated.
Sausage-block units are easy to renovate and easy to let, says Jason Yianakis, agent at Lochore's, which makes them popular with investors. Century 21 agent Phil Smith is one such landlord who owns two sausage-block units in the heart of Takapuna. One is about to be renovated, but the other is leased for $530 a week.
At one point twins Trev and Mil Ion and business partner Noel Franchi had 37 gangs of builders working on the North Shore alone, says nephew Ron Ion. It was a different era. Franchi told the younger Ion at a funeral a few years ago that they would buy a section on the weekend and telephone the council on the Monday to let staff know that the footings were in place. An in-house draftsman would have the exact plans ready by Wednesday.
Franchi and Ion units were built by several related businesses from the mid-1960s until the late 1970s or early 1980s. Franchi was the builder and Trev Ion the businessman.