Ludovico Einaudi is described as an alt.classical pianist, yet he has enticed a perfectly respectable concert violinist, Daniel Hope, on to his new album, In a Time Lapse.
Overseas critics may claim that they hear cascades of emotion here; I hear nothing but the almost relentless tinkle of piano, doodling around in a no-man's land, halfway between Arvo Part and Richard Clayderman, sometimes underpinned with modish electronica.
I could imagine both these albums giving pleasure to less-jaded palates, but what audience do cellists Luka Sulic and Stjepan Hauser expect with In2ition, their latest outing as the duo 2Cellos.
Any solid classical background these two Croatians have seems irrelevant when Elton John lauds them as the most exciting thing since Jimi Hendrix in the late 60s.
The English singer is one of numerous guests, rasping his way through Fleetwood Mac's Oh, Well - and repaid, or perhaps punished, when Sulic and Hauser take to Candle in the Wind molto lugubrioso.
A bit of campy attitude may have saved the day, but earnestness rules. Steve Vai's electric guitar flails noisily through Highway to Hell, Lang Lang pounds a sometimes distorted Steinway on Clocks and model/singer Sky Ferreira trails Cher's Bang Bang along the slow road to ennui.
Classic CDs
• Mediterraneo (Virgin Classics)
Rating: 3/5
• Ludovico Einaudi, In a Time Lapse (Deutsche Grammophon)
Rating: 2/5
• 2Cellos/In2ition (Sony)
Rating: 1/5
Verdict: The Slippery Path to Crossover Crescent, or the Perils of Classics on the Light Side