Tetraplegic mother's sudden death after stroke leaves family struggling

Shelley Utiger, 31, died suddenly leaving behind her severely autistic 5-year-old son.

Shelley Utiger's 31 years were tougher than most.

She was left a tetraplegic after she was hit by a drunk driver at the age of 2 but despite that she went on to have a son with her life-long partner, Hamish, who she met at 16.

Ten years later they were gifted with the miracle of their only child Dylan, now 5 years old.

Utiger's world revolved around Dylan, who is severely autistic, and she raised him from the seat of her wheelchair.

But, on July 2 the family's life was turned upside-down again when Utiger was rushed to hospital after having a stroke.

Utiger's mother and carer, Maree Utiger, went to check on her daughter because she was complaining of severe pain all over her body. That pain became worse and she became unconscious and unresponsive - the result of a sudden stroke.

Maree began CPR and continued it until paramedics arrived to air-lift Utiger to hospital.

Brain scans and other tests at Nelson Hospital showed a large brain bleed in the middle of Utiger's brain.

The family were told that if she was to undergo a successful surgery it was likely she'd be blind, deaf and immobile.

It wasn't long before the bleed became too much and Utiger was pronounced brain dead.

The next day, on July 3, Utiger died after her life-support was turned off.

Now, her grieving family are fundraising through Givealittle for funeral costs and to support Utiger's mother, who worked as her daughter's fulltime carer; Shelley's son Dylan; and siblings Blair, 17, who has cerebral palsy and Chanel, 15.

Son-in-law Hemi Blackler set up the page to support Maree, the mother of his fiance and Utiger's sister, Jacque, 27.

He described Maree, who lives in Motueka, as a "superhero mother" who cares for her children and grandson day-in and day-out.

"This family is as solid as a rock, they trust, love and depend on one another, operating as one unit," he wrote on Givealittle.

"You can only imagine how distraught they are now losing Shelley, who from such a tragic accident as an infant tightly knitted this family together.

"Maree and her family have been dealt an extremely tough hand in life with two children of her own being disabled and a disabled grandson who she has always supported, but heroically Maree has always continued to preserve always putting her children first because she truly is a superwoman."

Utiger had no life insurance because of her disability and Maree had lost her only source of income now she is no longer Utiger's carer, so the family were struggling financially, he said.

"Any donations would be gratefully and graciously accepted to help cover funeral costs and relieve immediate financial pressures and hopefully enough can be raised to help support Dylan as he gets older and requires further financial assistance."