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Home / New Zealand

Steve Braunias: The secret diary of The Anti-Ardernists

Steve Braunias
By Steve Braunias
Senior Writer·NZ Herald·
8 Jul, 2022 05:00 PM3 mins to read

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PM Jacinda Ardern has met with her UK counterpart in London, where discussions took place around the UK FTA, Ukraine, and an extension to the youth working holiday scheme. Video / Thomas Coughlan / AP
Steve Braunias
Opinion by Steve Braunias
Steve Braunias writes for the Listener and Newsroom.
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OPINION

The $1.8 billion trade deal in Brussels

Is that all? Pathetic. We could have done so much better. A few crumbs from Europe's table isn't going to pull the New Zealand economy out of a slump twice as bad as the Depression.

And you can just bet that while she was smiling and preening for the cameras in Brussels, unsung heroes were doing the hard yards behind the scenes and apologising for her behaviour. She has made New Zealand an international laughing stock. John Key, on the other hand, played golf with President Obama.

It's rumoured he said JK was the best caddy he ever had.

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The dress she wore at Downing St

What was she thinking? The answer is the same as always: herself. John Key would never have worn something that drew attention to himself. No one can remember anything he wore and that's a mark of the class of the man.

And the fact her dress cost $3000 is a case of criminal negligence. People have been prosecuted for less. But a cushy life sentence is too good for her. They made gulags for people like Ardern. No wonder she didn't dare visit Russia.

Jacinda Ardern in the pointy-collared white dress, shakes Boris Johnson's hand outside 10 Downing St, one of his final acts in his role. Photo / Getty Images
Jacinda Ardern in the pointy-collared white dress, shakes Boris Johnson's hand outside 10 Downing St, one of his final acts in his role. Photo / Getty Images

And no wonder BoJo threw in the towel a few days after she dragged him out of Number 10 for a photo opportunity. She has his blood on her hands. The stains will ruin that dress, but what does she care?

It wasn't even an original look. Her white Emilia Wickstead midi dress clearly channelled the Duchess of Cambridge, who wore it on a visit to India in 2016. But even then Ardern couldn't get it right. Her collar was pointed, but the collars on the version of the dress worn by Kate Middleton were round.

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She could have done so much better.

The red traffic light setting

Will the new wave of Covid kill us all? Ardern says she isn't looking at the red traffic light setting "at this stage". But that could mean anything, which is typical of her mastery of spin. No one does it better.

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Meanwhile, the health system is at breaking point, policing is at breaking point, the fire service is at breaking point, and unemployment levels have gone beyond breaking point and are now three times as bad as the Depression.

It's no exaggeration to say that death will come as a relief for many.

In general

Will life ever be sane again? The Ardern Era, with its toxic stardust, has poisoned the political and social air for many years to come. We will look back on her Labour-led government with horror and disbelief. By that time the thought police will have locked up innocent citizens whose only crime was to express views that make life difficult for minorities. The streets will be empty. The farms will have gone to seed.

But one day laughter will once again be heard in the Koru Club. Happy days are surely upon us. Ardern's popularity has plummeted, and no amount of smiling and preening will change that. She has made a hash of things and consigned New Zealand to a state four times as bad as the Depression. The public have had enough, and will vote in a National-led government in 2023.

It's a shame, though, that the party is led by Christopher Luxon. We could have done so much better.

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