Tanya Anderson spent Christmas Day at her fiance’s graveside.
Richard Martin, 58, died in hospital six days after suffering critical injuries when he was hit by a car on Arawa St in Rotorua on September 17.
Anderson’s was one of eight families who spent the holidays without someone special because of road crashes in the city last year.
As the Bay of Plenty reels from one of its worst road tolls in years, Anderson is reminding drivers all crashes are avoidable - and no one wants to experience the heartbreak she has had to endure since losing the love of her life.
“The days, weeks and months following the loss of my love stood still yet passed so quickly. A day doesn’t go by that I don’t think of him and ask the question ‘why?’. Why was such a beautiful, loving man taken from us so soon.”
Anderson said she replayed the event over and over in her head and each time hoped for a different outcome or that he would come home.
“So many hearts are broken from what seems like a senseless accident that could have been avoided. Vehicles are an essential form of transport but also are very dangerous.”
She said there were laws in place around drivers and vehicles to protect everyone.
“Don’t disregard them. Don’t ever think it won’t happen to you. The consequence of an accident can cause serious harm or even worse death. Something that destroys families and communities forever.”
Martin was struck by a vehicle after crossing the road on Arawa St just outside the Rotorua Citizen’s Club about 2am. Anderson was only a few steps in front of him.
A police investigation into the circumstances is continuing.
She said the thought of spending their first Christmas apart was overwhelming.
“If there was a skip button I would have pushed it. I only carried on for my family.”
They kept Christmas small and simple and had Martin’s photo “centre stage” on the table along with Anderson’s parents.
“We talked to him and about him. Missing him with all our hearts. A big gaping hole in our lives.”
She said the family had Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve and she chose to spend Christmas Day at Martin’s graveside.
“I went to the grave for the day, still in disbelief and immense grief. I will love him until the day I join him in eternity.”
Her New Year was quiet and it felt sad for her to move into 2023 leaving behind the year her “love” last lived.
“Grief is a journey and we all go through it differently. You never move on and get over it. You have to learn how to move forward with it as excruciating as it is. It is a reflection of the love lost.”
She said she was grateful for the love and support she’d been given by family and close friends and would carry “Richie” in her heart forever.
“Our love was something only few get to experience. True, divine, devoted love that no one can take away ever.”
Martin was one of eight people killed on Rotorua roads last year. His death contributed to 60 deaths in the Bay of Plenty in 2022, compared with 41 and 39 respectively in the previous years, information provided by police shows.
Inspector Brent Crowe, who had been the Bay of Plenty road policing manager for seven years until the end of last year, said the Bay’s annual road toll usually sat around the early 40s.
While several factors could contribute to fatalities, including speed, drink driving was one of the worst in the Bay of Plenty.
“It’s our nemesis in the Bay of Plenty and usually accounts for 50 per cent of our fatal crashes.”
He said driving drunk had been unlawful since 1969 and a major road safety focus in the 1980s yet police were still discovering significant numbers of drivers risking their lives and the lives of others by choosing to drive after consuming alcohol and/or illicit drugs.
New Zealand had its highest road toll in 2022 in four years, with 377 people dying on the country’s roads by the end of 2022.
The last time the road toll was that high was in 2018, with a significant drop seen during the years of Covid-19 lockdowns.
The Government’s Road to Zero safety strategy and action plan launched in 2019 had a target of reducing road deaths by 40 per cent by 2030. At the time of the launch it was said on average, one person was killed every day on New Zealand roads and another seven were seriously injured.
The plan’s mission statement said the Road to Zero strategy sets out a vision for a New Zealand where no one is killed or seriously injured in road crashes. It includes guiding principles for how roads are designed and making road safety decisions.