A homegrown reality television star says he is "embarrassed and ashamed" at offensive messages he sent a woman on dating app Tinder.

The Auckland woman recognised Andrew Jury from Three's reality show Married at First Sight as a Tinder match who had sent her the abusive messages.

Maria Mo, 30, said she had matched with Jury on Tinder back in 2015, but things didn't get off to a good start between the pair.

"I swiped right, and I think it was the first message he sent to me was 'fancy satisfying my Asian fetish'."

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"I'm so not into that at all - any kind of stereotyping or racist stuff."

Mo, 30, replied with "Ew, go f*k yourself", and Jury responded, calling her 'ugly' and 'a mutant'.

Jury has owned up to sending the messages, saying he was "ashamed and embarrassed".

"I would take it back if I could, but as I deleted my all dating apps ages ago I can't apologise to the individual in person," he said.

"I hope everyone can forgive and forget as I'm a new man these days."

Mo said reading those kind of comments about herself was "jarring".

"The messages were entirely misogynistic and bullying in their nature, just disgusting.

"I sent him a message that pretty much said 'Thanks for the laugh' - but that was in defence of myself rather than me being accepting of his gross behaviour."

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The 30-year-old said she deleted her Tinder profile soon after, but not before she had snapped some screenshots.

Mo said she was already in the practise of sharing Tinder interactions gone wrong with her female friends online.

"By that point I had discovered what a cesspool Tinder was in terms of the men that you come across."

Mo said she deleted the app from her phone entirely a couple of months after the interaction. Jury was part of a bigger picture, she said, "one of the guys that frequent the app and think they can say anything to anyone".

But she said he wasn't the sole reason she ditched the app.

"I don't think he's worth that."

Mo had recognised Jury when watching MAFS with some friends. She didn't normally watch, she said, so didn't know who anyone was.

But she recovered the screenshots of the message exchange on her phone, and it was definitely him.

"My friends were like, 'He seems really sweet, almost too caring'," she said.

"I guess it goes to show you don't know who people are online."