KEY POINTS:
I'm reading a book at the moment in which a young reporter is sent along to interview the local psychic. She asks him to make some predictions for the year ahead, and he does.
Among his predictions, he sees "plastic clogs with holes in them. They're in all
the colours of the rainbow. They're named after crocodiles. Everyone will be wearing them." Are you serious?' laughs the young reporter.
Sadly, he was deadly serious. The phenomenon of Crocs is right up there with all those other whacky ideas that people would have dismissed out of hand 50 years ago - like, choosing to live in Grey Lynn. And bottling water and selling it. And now big plastic clogs on people's feet. Adult's feet. And even more remarkably, erstwhile stylish women's feet. Maybe it's because I have ugly feet and short legs that I can't even begin to countenance wearing them. The idea of drawing attention to the fact that my legs end just as they've begun by plonking fluorescent orange clogs on my feet is anathema to me. But hundreds, indeed, hundreds of thousands of people are disregarding every aesthetic imperative they've ever lived by and are crossing the style Rubicon in their Crocs.
The three boys from Boulder, Colorado, who are responsible for these monstrosities are raking it in. The company turned over US$130.5 million (NZ$176 million) in the first six months of last year, compared with $36.7 million for the same period the year before. Alan Bollard's bothers would be all over if it had been a couple of Kiwis who'd invented Crocs. And given New Zealanders' fashion pragmatism - this being the home of the Stubbies shorts after all - I'm amazed a Kiwi didn't.
I'm not sure how much longer I can hold out against Crocs. I will never ever wear the clogs but having been directed to the company website, the gumboots look ideal for dog walking this winter, and there are some sweet little ballet pumps in gold. And I am now of an age where comfort offers more attraction than style. Still, it's hard to believe that something so ugly has so many fans. Can Crocs be considered the worst fashion crime of our generation? Or would MC Hammer pants still take top spot?