Glynes Schols: Flying in the face of adversity

COMMENT

In 1968 I ventured into the weird and wonderful world of air travel. Since that time, mainly because of a limited budget, I have tried most airlines.

I live in Canada, but return nearly every year to visit my family. There is one airline that I remain loyal too, because it has given me very few problems - our own Air NZ.

There are many tales to be told about the others.

One airline will always be remembered because it always had the announcements at airports: "We are sorry, the following flight has been delayed, rerouted, or cancelled."

Others take other liberties.

I have come to accept that I never get my allotted seat number. If one travels on one's own, as I do these days, the airline feels it can move me around anywhere to accommodate families - but why?

Do they pay more than I do?

On one of my horror trips, someone was sick outside the toilet, a stewardess threw coffee grounds over it, and said: "It is not our job to clean it up."

We put up with that smell for 6 hours.

Once on the flight, the hostesses decided to have a party, drawing the curtains around them. Hard to sleep with all that noise and laughter.

On one Mickey Mouse flight, we were waiting in Seattle Airport and my daughter looked out the window and said: "Mummy look at the funny old plane".

Yes, we flew on it because ours was having engine trouble.

The man in the seat behind asked me if I knew any prayers, but we landed safely regardless.

Luggage problems are another chapter of stories. My luggage has seen much more of the world than I have.

Once, while waiting for luggage at Auckland Airport, I laughed with my children at the sight of an old beat-up suitcase tied with string, until my children shouted, "Those are our clothes hanging out of it".

It had been run over by the tractor that tows the carts. Oh well, I did get a new suitcase out of it.

On my last flight back to Canada, we had a small delay. As we were ready to leave, the stewardess approached me and in a loud voice said, "Sorry, we have forgotten about your diabetic meal. We can order another but it will be another hour delay."

Would I incur the wrath of my fellow passengers? I think not. In Fiji they finally sorted me out and on the next leg of the journey I was given three seats to lie down (bad after effects of eating the wrong food). Thank you Air NZ for caring.

This year, I took a trip on a cruise ship to Alaska. Bliss.

No cramped legs, no balancing act with food trays, no wedging into toilets, no strangers asleep on my shoulders.

Now if I could just figure out a way to cruise to New Zealand for the same price as I pay in those crazy flying Machines.

* Glynes Schols is a regular visitor to Waiheke Island from Canada.