Marcus Lush on his epic journey. Photo / Marcus Lush / @skirtauckland / Twitter
It may be on Twitter but it's a more eloquent statement of "been there, done that" than Hillary managed. But broadcaster Marcus Lush knocked off his own Everest by walking all of Auckland's edges in a part-time odyssey spanning 18 months.
The Radio Live breakfast host set out in February 2013 to circumnavigate the twin-harbour city on foot, an exercise he expected would take 20 walking days. Why? "Because it seemed to be a good thing to do and once I started it had its own momentum. I got hooked. I was curious to see how big the city was."
It proved so big it took Lush until last month to complete his anti-clockwise amble, which started and finished in Whangaparaoa. He covered 1100km.
Walking 10 to 15 km a day, sometimes daily, the exercise has left him with an unrivalled knowledge of the sprawling city, its daily rhythms and the lifestyles of its inhabitants.
Yes, it's the same Lush who, 12 years ago, forsook the city he'd spent his life in (sometimes too indulgently) for the more grounded experience of Bluff. And no, he's unrepentant - more content in Bluff and still convinced that Auckland is a rat race fuelled by inflated property values.
But skirting the city's perimeter has given him new-found admiration for the metropolis and all who struggle in her.
"I thought I knew the city, but God, there were some lovely spots, some beautiful communities that I'd never even given the time of day to.
"It was embarrassing, really, to find the places I hadn't seen before -- I'd almost written off some places but there were some fantastic places I got to. Wandering around Conifer Grove and Karaka. Communities that I would have trouble going back to find. God knows where they were."
The erstwhile Jafa, who endeared himself to national television audiences with a string of quirky travelogues starting with Off the Rails, reported almost every step of his journey on a Twitter account, @skirtAuckland, which attracted 2200 followers. The thousands of photos - good, bad and ugly - and Lush's signature one-liners will form the basis for a book that promises rare insight into suburban ordinariness.
FIRST STEP
This is a new account by me marcus lush for a project I am embarking on.
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) February 24, 2013
... AND LAST
Finished. Mission accomplished. 101 days. pic.twitter.com/ZEGwN6i59o
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) August 10, 2014
He peered into backyards, saw patterns in paving stones and flax leaves, found humour in signs, revealed forgotten plaques, obsessively photographed utility covers ...
"There were suburbs I thought I knew [about] but they were quite different to what I'd thought.
"I got the feeling most people seem to live in pretty nice communities. Some places didn't look quite as flash but the sense of community seemed a bit better. There were some suburbs where everyone seemed to be hidden behind walls."
The plan to walk the city's edges - where urban meets rural and where land meets water - required a degree of planning. Where access to the water was restricted - in peninsulas such as Pt Chevalier and estuaries such as the Whau - he would traipse every no exit street to honour his brief. "It was absolutely scientific."
One selfie shows him up to his knees in mud after a wrong turn. "There were places I'd never been to before and would never have thought to visit. I went right up the Tamaki Estuary - it took 10 days."
He saw a "really big" turtle in a stream near Lynnmall; peacocks up trees, pigs in backyards and "a lot of horticulture and agriculture".
He saw properties whose owners were "obviously hoarders" and passed by parties still going from the night before. He saw homeless people living in cars and under bridges.
He posted pictures of a replica ship in a front garden, a backyard miniature railway and "Auckland's most pretentious letterbox" - No. 5 Peregrine Place.
Aucklands most pretentious letterbox ... Anyone know who's it is ? 5 peregrine place. pic.twitter.com/Boh2IPh0TB
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) July 16, 2014
Yes it's not just an artists impression. pic.twitter.com/6fkYuP6w67
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) August 10, 2014
His "dairy of the day" tweet drew a cult following.
Not all suburbs were the same. "On the North Shore, everyone seemed to have basketball hoops in the backyard but in south Auckland there were not so many."
Some neighbourhoods had more abandoned trolleys than others; discarded mattresses had found unlikely beds.
He wasn't attacked by dogs and he didn't find any money. "I used to always find money as a kid."
The street that impressed him most was not in Remuera or Takapuna but in Greenhithe. "Kingfisher Grove has to be Auckland's best street." Upper harbour residents quietly enjoy terrific views, he says.
I I definitely think kingfisher grove is aucklands flashest st! Like Victoria ave before the infill housing arrived!
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) March 5, 2013
Of course, the former acerbic talkback host's celebrated departure from Auckland (he left in 2002 for the breakfast slot at Foveaux FM) was only briefly permanent and, apart from the property obsession jibes, he's hardly dissed the place.
His move to Radio Live allowed him to continue to broadcast from an Invercargill studio but radio and other commitments for the past several years have brought him to Auckland most weeks.
Time and distance seem to have refreshed his view of the city. "Places like Totara Park have these extraordinary reserves. You don't have to holiday in Fiji or Queenstown - you can holiday here."
There were deja vu moments, when he realised he was revisiting places from childhood and memories flooded back. "It made me wish I'd spent more time in them ... As you get older you become more interested in where people come from."
I'm going to make a call ..... Best dairy in 82 days pic.twitter.com/vBOsAAdE6u
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) June 15, 2014
He witnessed suburbs growing by the day - new migrants carrying boxes of possessions into brand new houses in Karaka. Elsewhere, open garage doors revealed extended families living inside.
"There were places in east Auckland where it felt like you were in a movie -- streets with brand new houses on one side and farms on the other and [neighbourhoods] that were all Korean or all Chinese.
"It did sometimes feel like an overseas trip - some of the places seemed completely foreign."
Very nice secret beach ... Of course the sign showing where it is has gone... pic.twitter.com/ToxZ56JPMp
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) July 24, 2014
This is the journey do far.... The red line.... Currently at Birkdale. pic.twitter.com/PlQHnsMRXt
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) June 22, 2014
But wandering the outskirts made Lush a fan of sprawl. "You'd get the feeling, why would you live in the city?" He found serene parks with boardwalks through wetlands and bush -- "but you never saw anyone. If people don't start using them, I think they will fall into disarray.
"There's beauty in the suburbs but they are empty [on weekdays]. That was the thing that surprised me. There was no one out walking. There were whole suburbs I went to that seemed to be zombie communities."
He hopes the upcoming book might "inspire people to not be so tribal - to get out into parts of the city they might never otherwise go to.
"I guess it was part of making peace with Auckland. I still live in Bluff but I work in Auckland.
"I don't see myself as being an Aucklander. It's a nice place to walk around but it looks like a bit of a struggle to live in sometimes. I can live without the property obsession but you do see some nice spots."
Something else happened to the 49-year-old along the way. His partner, Vanessa Underwood, became pregnant early on in the exercise and their son is now 9 months old. His name, inevitably, is Tracker.
Last tweet. pic.twitter.com/uyNbgGftbD
— Skirting Auckland (@SkirtAuckland) August 10, 2014
The boy’s family and friends came together this week to farewell him at his home.