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Desire and deception, lust and fetish, pleasure and pain - it's all happening beneath the waves, according to a new book about sex in the marine world.
"It's just mind-blowing what these creatures get up to," says Australian aquatic scientist Sheree Marris, author of KamaSEAtra: Secrets of Sex
in the Sea.
Raunch and randiness are rampant among sea creatures, Ms Marris says.
"There's jealousy, there are creatures who cheat on their partners, they do the same sort of things as us in terms of courting - they spray scented perfumes, they do amazing dances, they dress up and change colours.
"As humans we think we're such sexual beasts but compared to sea creatures we're just so boring."
Ms Marris says her interest in marine sex began when she first discovered the meaning of the term "dork". "I studied aquatic science at Deakin University but I was by no means an academic; the chemical equations and formulas and all that just kind of went in one ear and out the other," she admits.
"One of the things that I did learn was the real meaning for the word dork. A dork is a whale's penis and I thought, 'How cool is that?' When we're calling someone a dork we're basically calling them a big dick because these things are absolutely huge."
Ms Marris soon realised that she had discovered a way of getting people to share her passion for the fragile marine environment.
"I want to bring marine life to the surface because it's really difficult to get people to care for something they can't see," she says.
"And I thought what a great way to do that, by talking about sex."
This is an accessible, humorously written book divided into bite-sized chapters like "Orgies", "Does Size Matter", "Sneaky Sex" and "When Love Hurts", with a photographic spread on each page.
One of her personal favourites is the Deep Sea Angler (Melanocetus johnsoni), a grotesque-looking fish that lives deep in the ocean.
"The female angler isn't the most attractive thing but she's in the deep, deep depths so it doesn't matter," says Ms Marris.
To attract a male, she secretes a sweet-smelling perfume that arouses him so much that he is compelled to pursue and bite on to her.
"This is some extraordinary love bite because he never lets go," Ms Marris says. "He becomes fused to her and basically becomes a blob of testicles on her skin. She then chemically commands him to release sperm when she wants, so she's got this permanent sex slave.
"One female brought up from the depths had 11 males attached to her. She was one lucky girl."
Readers also will learn that the humble barnacle has the longest penis in relation to body size in the world.
"It's stuck to a rock so it's going to be pretty hard to meet the opposite sex," Ms Marris explains. "So it has this penis that can be rolled out and just go wandering around the rockpools in search of a mate."
The book also looks at parenthood.
"You've got seahorses where the females give the males the eggs and the males incubate them and give birth to the young.
"I just think, Godammit, why didn't humans go down that evolutionary path?"
Ms Marris, who wants to turn her book into a documentary series, is planning a book next year about sex in other parts of the animal kingdom called KamaZOOtra.
- AAP