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Home / Lifestyle

Let them cry: Study suggests cold comfort teaches babies self-control

Rhys Blakely
The Times·
11 Mar, 2020 12:06 AM2 mins to read

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A study suggests leaving babies to cry had no apparent impact on their emotional or cognitive development at 18 months. Photo / 123rf

A study suggests leaving babies to cry had no apparent impact on their emotional or cognitive development at 18 months. Photo / 123rf

Parents who let babies "cry it out" when they refuse to sleep do no harm to the child and may be teaching them self-control, a study suggests.

New mothers and fathers often agonise over whether to comfort infants. Advocates of "attachment parenting" argue that failing to respond promptly risks damaging a child's bond with its parents.

However, a study that tracked nearly 180 British mothers found that those who often or occasionally let their babies cry themselves to sleep developed just as good relationships with their children as those who did not.

Leaving babies to cry had no apparent impact on their emotional or cognitive development at 18 months. Tests indicated that it made no difference to how securely attached they felt to their mothers or how well they focused on tasks. The one effect was a little less crying at 18 months.

The findings might vindicate childcare authors such as Gina Ford, who has advocated letting babies learn how to settle themselves.

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Psychologists behind the study suggested that the long debate over parenting had been overblown. "This study shows that we have made a mountain out of a molehill," Dieter Wolke, of the University of Warwick, who led the research, published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, said.

Higher-income, older and more educated mothers were least likely to allow their children to cry it out. Professor Wolke said that some mothers needed to be careful not to wear themselves out.

"By six months, quite a lot of babies can sleep through the night," he said. "Learning how to self-soothe is the most important thing for this. If you intervene every time, it's like doing a child's homework: they will not learn."

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The study followed 178 mothers who were asked questions during their baby's first week and the third, sixth and eighteenth months, including whether they left their babies to cry "never" or "a few times" or "often".

Leaving infants to cry it out a few times during the first month and often at three months was associated with about five minutes less crying a day at 18 months.


Written by: Rhys Blakely
© The Times of London

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