KEY POINTS:
"Hey Jo," a colleague called out to me the other day. "Have you written a blog about Milfs?"
(Before you ask, no, I am not going to spell the acronym out for you. If you don't know what a MILF is, go rent American Pie.)
No, no I haven't.
"Oh, you
should. It's all my son and his friends ever talk about."
The son in question is 20.
Er, righto.
"Milfs and Gilfs."
You what? Gilfs? What on earth...
Oh god, the penny dropped.
A gilf is the next generation of milf. The next, older generation.
Eww, that's disgusting, I cried.
I was going to write a blog about cougars but that's even worse.
Which is when another colleague chimed in, asking what a cougar was.
And so it came to be that I am now writing a blog about Milfs, Gilfs and Cougars.
For those, like my workmate, unaware of the cougar, she is essentially an older woman on the prowl.
Aged between 35 and 50 (possibly older, I don't think there's a limit), she actively and aggressively seeks younger, sexual partners.
She is fiercely competitive and is openly hostile to her younger competitors.
To witness this increasingly common breed of woman, one need only head to the Viaduct for Friday night work drinks.
Be warned, it is not for the faint of heart.
Milfs and cougars are not mutually exclusive breeds of women, though an informal poll reveals some men believe milfs to be the gentler species due to their mothering instincts.
However, they are often more volatile, due to the fact they have generally been through a significant relationship break up, hence why they are now single with kids.
Though generally disliked by their young, female competitors, both the cougar and the Milf should be respected to a degree.
Indeed, one friend argues they serve an integral part of society.
"They are teachers. As younger women, we can enjoy the benefit of a guy who knows his way around a woman. Personally, I am forever indebted to the older women my partners have slept with."
As for the appeal of Milfs and Cougars - some guys love them, others find them terrifying.
It's all down to personal preference.
But Gilfs?? That is whack. Plain and simple