Be yourself
Just because you can re-invent yourself for somebody you never plan on seeing again, doesn't mean you should. Don't start your hook-up off with a bunch of lies to make yourself seem cooler than you really are.
But don't talk about home life
Don't use your holiday hook-up to complain about the banalities of your daily life. Your summer fling doesn't need to know that you hate your boss or your co-workers are conspiring against you. Nor do they want to hear about the random friends they will never meet. Keep all conversations about the moment or the abstract.
READ MORE: • "I had sex every day for a year"
Ask about their relationship status
Nobody wants to be an unwitting homewrecker. Before you hook-up with somebody on holiday, ensure you are both honest about what relationships, if any, you have going on at home. When on vacation, it's easy to omit this sort of information, but it's much harder to lie when directly asked.
Wash often
The sea doesn't count when it comes to cleanliness, and for holiday hook-ups it's nice to present the best version of yourself. A little soap and a scrub once or twice a day goes a really long way when it comes to impressing somebody who'll see you naked for the first time.
Practice safe sex
This goes without saying, but just because you're feeling frivolous about everything else in life at this time of year, doesn't mean sexual safety can go out the window too. Use condoms and lubricant, and no make-shift alternatives are allowed – that means steer clear of the cling wrap and cooking oil. Also do ensure you get an STI checkup when you return home; if you were unlucky enough to get the Christmas Clap, you need to deal with it promptly.
Be responsible with alcohol and consent
The same consent rules apply to holiday hook-ups as to those at home, where you feel even more accountable. Especially when alcohol comes into play: you must respect others' body language and decisions to say no.
Have sex in respectable places
Honestly, beach sex is not fun. Nor is sex in the bushes, or in a public toilet, or in your car. Inhibitions might be gone but have some self-respect (and respect for your summer lover) and keep your escapades to respectable, private places like a bedroom – preferably one you've been assigned to for your vacation, not someone else's.
Lay low on the kinky stuff
We all have kinks, but it's probably best not to try these out on somebody new, just because you don't think you'll ever see them again. Whatever fetishes you're into, it's better to leave them until you have a more developed relationship and a safe space to explore them in.
If you tell yourself "don't get attached" you're setting yourself up for failure
via GIPHY
One of the things that makes a holiday romance alluring is the time stamp that's on it. When you tell yourself not to get attached to somebody you only have a little while with, you may inevitably find yourself pining over them more than you usually would. This could simply be because of the seemingly illicit nature of it all. So let yourself have all the romantic feels you want, and deal with the consequences later – some holiday hook-ups do turn into long-term relationships, after all.
Got a question about sex, sexuality, and all things related? Send it to lee.suckling@gmail.com and Let's Talk About Sex.
